INTIMATE BROWN PHOTO FROM CABINET ROOM

FUCK OFF YOU USELESS, ONE-EYED TWAT AND TAKE YOUR CRABBIT WIFE AND SNOTTY WEANS WITH YOU. 

 GOOD FUCKING RIDDANCE!

BROWN PROPOSES LEADERS' WIVES NUDE MUD-WRESTLING CONTEST IF IT'S A HUNG PARLIAMENT!

An increasingly desperate Prime Minister, Gordon Brown has proposed to the Leaders of the other political parties that in the event of a 'hung Parliament a leaders' wives, mud-wrestling contest be held to decide who will form the next Government!

ITV, SKY and the BBC are all said to be keen to stage such an event particularly as it proposed that the wives wrestle in the nude.  Mr Cameron's wife, SUMCUM is obviously at a disadvantage being six months pregnant however as she told  a NEWS CONFERENCE this afternoon in her usual demure way, "fucking never mind that, I won't be long in kicking that SARAH right in her FANNY"!

Alex Salmond's wife does not participate in day to day politics but SNP PIN-UP, NICOLA STURGEON is keen to take part.  She told D.L. today that although she was diminutive going by BIG SARAH'S STANDARDS, she was as 'tough as fucking nails' and "wouldn't be long in kicking the SHITE OUT OF THOSE ENGLISH BITCHES".  "I see this as Scotland's chance to be properly represented in THIS ELECTION AFTER BEING SIDELINED IN THE LEADERS' DEBATES".

WE DON'T WANT TO BE LIKE YOU, YOU MISERABLE WANKER!

Labour Party hopeful, Gordon Brown, started the second day of the campaign by emphasizing what an ordinary, miserable wanker he is.
"Sarah and I sometimes just sit in Downing Street, after having had a supper of frozen Cottage Pie from The Co-Op, watching some game of footy on the telly or one of those reality game shows like, "Mandy rehearses for the part of Tinkerbell" and how we laugh!  Not for us, the 'high life' that the Tories enjoy".

A Mr Ainsworth, a baldy twat, who has taken to wearing a 'syrup of figs' in recent years and was standing nearby, was heard to remark, "FUCK THAT!  I hope that miserable SCOTCH FUCKER gets his.  I'm fed up being ordinary.  I want to be in STRINGFELLOWS WITH DAVE AND GEORGEY-BOY!

GORDON TAKING "UGLY" PILLS!

WELL WE NOW KNOW WHO'S TAKING THE UGLY PILLS IN THE BROWN FAMILY!

SARAH BROWN IN LOVE TRYST WITH OBAMAS!

Sources tonight in PITTTSBURGH at the G20 meeting have confirmed that BRITISH PRIME MINISTER'S WIFE, Sarah Brown is involved in a LOVE TRYST with PRESIDENT OBAMA his WIFE!


Sarah pictured above holding Obama's hand whilst getting HER ARSE fondled by his wife is said to have later enjoyed A CARNAL SEX ORGY with the OBAMAS during which she was introduced to sexual position no. 193 in the Black Kama Sutra, known as the MISSISSIPPI MUD PIE.

This involves being the "CREAM IN THE CAKE" between the sex hungry OBAMAS. Mrs Obama is said to be the first President's wife in history to take an active part in the celebrated PRESIDENTIAL SEXUAL AFFAIRS.


Sarah Brown's husband, THE HAPLESS GORDON, is reported to have encouraged the affair as a way of getting a seat at the MAIN MAN'S TABLE and he was seen practising with THE KING DING-A LING'S STAR WARS LITE SABRE as his wife was ravished by the sex hungry OBAMAS.


French and Italian Presidents SARKOZY AND BERLUSCONI and their partners are to join the GLEESOME THREESOME for a TOGA ORGY at the conclusion of the G20 summit.


Sarah Brown is said to have cooled in her LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP with JOANNA LUMLEY reported earlier in the year.

P.M. ARRESTED FOR HORSE-SHAGGING IN U.S.

THE HORSE'S ARSE THAT HE SHAGGED

A BRITISH PRIME MINISTER, GORDON BROWN, has been arrested for having sex with a horse, whilst on holiday in the U.S. with his wife SARAH, after police said the animal's owner caught him on a surveillance camera.

Police said it wasn't the first time 50-year-old GORDON BROWN had been charged; last year he pleaded guilty to having sex with the same horse and was placed on the state's sex offender list.
Police arrested BROWN on Monday, when he returned to the stable 20 miles (32 kilometres) northeast of Myrtle Beach where owner Barbara Kenley said a camera caught him having sex with her horse earlier this month.

After fucking the horse Brown, will be returning to the U.K. shortly where he will continue to Fuck the British Country.

(The names in the above story have been changed to save embarrassment to the real perpetrator)

SARAH BROWN AND LUMLEY IN LESBIAN TRYST

SARAH BROWN AND JOANNA LUMLEY PREPARE TO "TONGUE WRESTLE" BEHIND BROWN'S BACK

Prime Minister's wife Sarah has tonight been talking about her lesbian tendencies.

"It's really been growing over the last few months, what with this fucking so called GLOBAL crisis". Gordon knows it's really his fault with his hopeless handling of the Economy over 10 years and he's been so grumpy". "He was never any good in bed anyway and how we managed to have children is beyond me". "He keeps going on about sinning in the eyes of the Lord when we're shagging and to be honest with you it fucking puts me off".

"Anyway", continued Sarah, "Harriet and Blearsy were round a couple of months ago and the three of us got a bit rat arsed on No 10's claret and we ended up in the Sauna, bollock naked". "Well one thing led to another and before I knew where I was, I was being introduced to Lesbian Power Sex".

"As you know Gordon insisted that I went on the Gay Pride March a couple of weeks ago and I got talking to a couple of nice old girls in denim boiler suits and anyway the upshot is that I think I am going to come out".

"When I met Joanna Lumley, I knew she would be up for a "good old tonsil tonguing" as she had appeared in a couple of porno movies when she was younger, but surprisingly she was not too happy about it".

"I wonder if Cherie Blair will be home this weekend as I hear she's up for it and Gordy would like to watch whilst "CHOKING THE CHICKEN".