A couple were outraged when airport check-in staff said they couldn't sit in the emergency exit seats they had paid extra for because they were too old.
Marion Webb, 77, and husband Derek, 79, forked out an extra £100 for seats with extra leg room on top of the £2,360 they paid for a trip to Egypt with Thomson Airways.
QUITE FUCKING RIGHT TOO! What would have happened if one of the OLD COFFIN DODGERS had died on the Flight? People could have been trapped in the plane. Why are they going to EGYPT in the first place. Do they have a TOMB LINED UP? Anyway what's wrong with BLACKPOOL? They could sit on the prom and feed SANDWICHES TO THE SEAGULLS, instead of looking at some ANCIENT MONUMENTS, some, as old as them. They should be leaving their money for their weans anyway. Obviously a PAIR OF GREEDY OLD BASTARDS!
P.S. if you look closely, you'll see the old twat has pished the front of his trousers!
STUART MacLENNAN, the LABOUR candidate, in MORAY has been sacked by that ARSEHOLE JIM MURPHY for amongst other things calling OAPs, 'COFFIN DODGERS'.
In a series of posts scattered with four-letter words, he attacked the Commons Speaker John Bercow ("tit"), David Cameron ("twat"), Nick Clegg ("a bastard") and the Labour backbencher Diane Abbot ("a fucking idiot").
Well, WHO THE FUCK IS GOING TO ARGUE WITH THAT? The words that Stuart used are the language of the young. TWITTER is full of similar comments. LABOUR should have the courage of their convictions. The whole thing is a load OF PISH! Just wait till I get onto TWITTER. I'LL SORT THE BASTARDS OUT!
They have survived for more than a century as one of our most familiar sights: the traditional British postman trundling up the lane on his sturdy bicycle.
But now pedal-powered deliveries are falling victim to the 21st century's most fearsome foe... health and safety. The Royal Mail's chief executive Adam Crozier is phasing out the company's 24,000 English-made bicycles and replacing them with vans because of the 'safety risk'.
FUCK ME!
For an alternative view on the BUDGET we go over to DARREN MURPHY, (pictured centre)
"Whit do I think of the Budgie? Ha, Ha, Budgie! Get it? That's cracking that! My maw was saying that the CIDER going up 6p a two litre bottle. That's shite that, BTW. Ah'll maybe have to start charging mair fur ma wraps of Skunk. Either that or there'll need to be less stuff in a wrap and ma punters will no be happy aboot that! That bastard dissnae understand the economic consequences of putting the bevvy up. Then he's telling us that we've got to go on a course for six months. He can shove that up his Tory arsehole. Am no working for peanuts! Neither are my mates. When are we going to get the time tae drink and dae drugs an' that? My mate's Da, says he'll no be able to run his motor when the petrol goes up, so he'll no be able to deliver curries for the Pakis and that. This lots no fur the working man. When I get the vote I'm going to text in my vote for that Labour lot, cause they Tories have done nothing for me or my mates. Whit's that you say? It's Labour that's been in! Your joking me?"
The Scottish Women's sea swimming season started today in North Berwick, with the women of the douce Scottish town taking the first dip of the year, so far.
Their President, BIG JEAN, commented, "Aye, weel. It was a bit too warm for us this year. It was only minus five outside but the water was at a tepid plus two. Some of us had to break the ice which is unusual for sea water in these latitudes". "Some of the girls cheated by having a 'PISHY', which gave them wee hot patches to swim in. If we find who it was, they'll be thrown out of the club for CHEATING. It was probably those two big soft JESSIES from LONDON. They're no used to the delights of the mediterranean like conditions we get in the FIRTH of FORTH. Last year two of the lassies had to fight a POLAR BEAR. But after we barbequed it, we found the meat was a bit stringy and tasteless, not nearly as delicious as the PENGUINS we'd pot-roasted the year before.
Police officers have been banned from asking for 'Christian' names for fear of offending other religions.
FUCK ME! Does anybody else yearn for the days when the SWEENEY burst through the doors and kicked the VILLAIN IN THE NUTS! If they were wrong and he was INNOCENT, he got a LETTER OF APOLOGY FROM THE CHIEF CONSTABLE and if he wasn't available some DESK SERGEANT!
AH! THE NOSTALGIA.
Jack Straw, (the weasel faced bastard), is said to be working on plans to include the abolition of the HOUSE OF LORDS and it's replacement with an elected SENATE, modelled on the American legislature with elections held at the same time as a General Election with members being able to sit for a maximum of three, five year terms.
Strangely enough, for once in my life, I broadly agree with LABOUR! I think it's time we got rid of the House of Lords and it should be elected. I don't agree though that it should be elected at the same time as at a General Election. If it was, it would broadly reflect the same vote as the make-up of the Commons, even if it was by proportional representation. It would be much better if it was elected MID-TERM and then perhaps it would be of a different make-up to the Commons and consequently it would not necessarily agree with the voting intentions of the upper house and would therefore be better placed to be a check on the Government of the day. It shouldn't be able to make legislation but should be used to scrutinise what the Upper house is doing and if necessary send it back to them for amending.
The wearing of ermine robes should not be compulsory!
