UFOs WILL BE WATCHING ROYAL WEDDING SAYS NUTJOB!

Prince William and Kate Middleton’s royal wedding is expected to be viewed by over a billion people around the world – but also by a few UFOs according to a retired Air Force major.

Former military officer George Filer runs the National UFO Centre and says it’s common to see the extraterrestrials around important events, and is highly possible they may be watching the royal wedding too.  Mr Filer told AOL News: ‘The craft seem to have an interest in anything important. They’ve been sighted recently over Libya and near the Japanese tsunami.’

This nutjob should be sectioned under the Mental Health Act as he's obviously unhinged if he thinks that UFOs will be interested in this soon to be baldy prick and HRH Prince William, getting married.  She'll be ditched like a hot potato if she doesn't supply an heir, sharpish, although I expect she's been well checked out.  Let's hope he manages something more successful than his Grandfather allegedly produced.  A crabbit bitch, a fuckwit, a pervert and a shirt-lifter.

WILLIE AND KATE-PASS THE SICK BAG QUICK!

The Prince of Cuddles: The touching embrace that shows the love between William and Kate... and a refreshing departure from Royal protocol 

If there were any lingering doubts over just what sort of a man Prince William is – or just how determined he is to do things his way – this is the picture that dispels them. 

In contrast with previous generations of Royal husbands-to-be and with scant concern for traditional reserve, William wraps Kate Middleton protectively in his arms, cherished and embraced for all the world to see. 

It is not so much a formal portrait as a remarkable public declaration of love to herald a new Royal age.

FOR FUCK'S SAKE PASS THE SICK BAG!

I don't blame the kids.  They are what they are. A pair of upper class twits, although to be fair her parents did at least make their own money, unlike his.  Him from the most powerful family in the world and although he is steeped in their traditions, he didn't ask to be born a Royal.  No, what gets me, is the fucking royal sycophants, who stand there and wave their Union Jacks at a family of Germans, many of whom, rightly or wrongly wanted to side with Hitler in the last war, who don't realise that the Royals and their like, have manipulated the people for centuries.  I suppose they just like to get trodden on.  It's time the whole Royal shitheap was demolished and we got shot of five of her palaces and then we could give Willie the chance to use his 'art degree', by cataloguing the Royal art collection for sale by public auction.

'QUEEN CATHERINE' AGREES TO PRE-NUPTIAL DECAPITATION!

Queen to be Catherine Middleton, has agreed to decapitation should she not manage to furnish the Royal family with a healthy male heir.


Dr David Starkey, the well known historian, talk show arsehole and Gay rent boy shagger, who has been retained by the Royals to explain the protocol to the Middleton family.


"It has been the custom for hundreds of years, that any Queen Catherine who fails to produce a male heir is liable to be decapitated, by her husband.  This goes back to King Henry V11, the father of good King Hal, who had the decapitation clause entered into his pre-nuptials, by Thomas Cramner, whose ancestor now plays central midfield for Aston Villa", said Starkey writing in this month's 'Musclemen' magazine, where he has been chosen as the 'Gay Hunk' of the month.