Monday 9 November 2009

SHOCK SHOWBIZ NEWS-BOYBAND MEMBER IS HETEROSEXUAL!


Boy band member MARK MOWEN, of the BARBERSHOP SINGING QUARTET 'TAKE THAT' came out yesterday as being of the HETEROSEXUAL VARIETY at his marriage in INVERNESS to his blushing bride EMMA FERGUSON.



The news has shocked other BOY BAND ENSEMBLES and band members such as GARY BARLOW who said, " I can't believe the LITTLE FUCKER. He gave me a HAND JOB behind the caravans at T IN THE PARK in August. I would never have spat it out when I gave him a BJ if I'd known he was a HETERO as it made me look silly". Trade and Industry Minister, Lord Mandelson was said to be livid when he heard, "oh the little minx" he said"married and I didn't get an invitation and I look SO GOOD IN A KILT TOO"!


We at DL wish the Bride and Groom a long and happy life, but take it from me Emma, should he ask for sex like a Sailor, RUN LIKE FUCK STRAIGHT TO A LAWER!

4 comments:

Dark Lochnagar said...

I write to my M.P. on a regular basis but after his rather curt lketter about the erosion of D.L.A. for the over 65s it would appear he's not too happy. He thinks I an the spokesman for a group of jimpies, so he needs our vote. Write to yours through www.theyworkforyou.com it's a fucking laugh!

Lauren Simcock said...

I wouldn't give mine the steam off my piss DL.

Dark Lochnagar said...

No, neither would I, but I also like to tie the cunt up in paperwork to make sure he is earning his money.

Anonymous said...

Well I agree but I think the brief should prepare more info then it has.