SAFETY POLICE licensed by the DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH will soon have the right of entry into your home to check on the following: smoke alarms, stair gates, locks on medicine cabinets, windows and oven doors and finally bath temperature controls.
Initially this will be for homes with young children and a computer database will be set up. " One million accidents happen every year in the home to children and many of these are preventable" said a Government spokesman.
Mrs DL is seen in the photograph fitting a smoke alarm in case I set the chip pan on fire again when I'M PISHED!
However my friends, do you think the SAFETY POLICE WILL STOP AT FAMILIES WITH CHILDREN. I don't fucking think so! They'll soon be checking if you SMOKE OR DRINK in the house CONTRARY TO E.C. LAWS. Will they be checking to see if you have CLEAN KNICKERS ON, in case you have an accident? Soon there will be a series of court fines starting at £100 for SKIDMARKS in your Y's.
YES, WE'RE IN THE SHITE, but never mind nice Mr CAMERON, says he'll get us OUT OF IT! AYE RIGHT.