NORMAN WISDOM, 95 DIES UNAWARE OF HIS FOOTBALL GENIUS!

NORMAN WISDOM

Legendary 'comedian', Sir Norman Wisdom died yesterday, aged 95 blissfully unaware that he could have been England's finest footballer instead of the UNFUNNIEST FUCKER OF THE LAST CENTURY.

Wisdom was put into stage school aged 3, so it was strange that he was as unfunny as a juicy fart in a pair of white trousers.  Had his parents given him a normal childhood they would have realised that with his bendy legs and cheeky quip, he could have become even a greater footballer than the famous, Bobby Moore.
Alex Ferguson, boss of the Red Devils of Manchester, said yesterday, "Norman could have been one of the best.  I remember seeing him in a film made in 1952 and thinking what a great body swerve he had, if someone had only given him a ball.  As it was, he remains one of England's worst comedians.  How the fuck, he ever made any money is beyond me"!  Arsene Wenger, manager of the 'Gunners' said, "Oui, I recall seeing him in a film about your seaside town of Margate and thinking, what an unfunny cunt he is.  I prefer Le Francaise, Claude Chevall, what a funny fucker he was"!  England manager, Capello, told DL, "Si, I am remembering him.  This is the one with zi hitler mustashe and walking pole, no?

SIR ALEX FERGUSON-TYPICAL SOCIALIST BAD LOSER!

FERGUSON WIPES AWAY THE SNOTTERS AFTER LAST NIGHT'S GAME

Sir Alex Ferguson reacted to Manchester United’s Champions League elimination on a sour note by labelling Bayern Munich as ‘typical Germans’ after claiming Louis van Gaal’s players deliberately targeted Wayne Rooney and influenced the second-half dismissal of defender Rafael da Silva.

Typical SOCIALIST.  EVERY BODY'S FAULT BUT OURS!  Rafael should have been off for his tackle in the first half.  PRICK!  And he's an ex AYR UNITED player.  Whit a disgrace to his country!

SIR ALEX FERGUSON TO SUPPORT LABOUR IN GLASGOW ELECTION

SIR ALEX FERGUSON, knighted by New Labour for services to New Labour is to support Labour in Glasgow N.E. TO STOP THE CITY BEING RIPPED OFF BY THE SNP.


Although I find it difficult to criticise a former Ayr United player, has the DRINK-SODDEN FUCKWIT taken leave of what little sense he has left if his recent interviews are taken into account.


Does he honestly think that the SNP are the majority party at Westminster. Does he not realise that LABOUR HAVE LET DOWN GLASGOW FOR 74 YEARS? The population of GLASGOW have been KEPT POOR TO ENSURE THEY VOTE FOR LABOUR! How much of his many, many millions is he donating to the people of Glasgow N.E.


And finally, does WILLIE BAIN believe that an endorsement from someone who PLAYED FOR RANGER F.C. is going to help him in PREDOMINATELY CATHOLIC GLASGOW N.E.?

WHAT A PAIR OF PRICKS!