Thursday, 3 November 2011

XMAS DINNER FOR £2.89 EACH FOR YOU TIGHT BASTARDS!



Now purely as a service for you Christians, (I am a Humanist and anyway will be in Spain for Xmas), I provide you with a way to have your Xmas dinner for £2.89 each.

Now I know that  some of you will not be spending even this much, Banned, because I think he might be a tight bastard, Harbinger because he's skint (although he has many talents and shouldn't be), Tiger because he's a millionaire, Toni and Publes because they're Scottish and wouldn't spent that much on a Christian festival.

So, my friends, although I will be here for another 5 weeks or so, before I winter in the balmy, Costa Calida, (where it will be 20c), I wish you a merry Christmas, (I refuse to say Happy Holidays in a Christian country).  It is a little early I know, but that is the current trend, Xmas in August and all that.

 For all of you here enduring the early dark, the snow and cold, may I remind you that you can get cheap flights to Murcia, over Xmas if you book now.  I'll pick you up (If you pay my diesel) and I'll get you somewhere nice to stay at a good rate.  Contact me at  spainpropertymangement@live.co.uk

Look forward to meeting you!

6 comments:

subrosa said...

Thanks for the offer but I intend to bed down with the heating blasting, a chunk of sirloin in the oven and a pile of good books. Eat when I like and what I like and no hassle with travel. Wonderful. :)

Dark Lochnagar said...

Rosie, there is no hassle. Fly to Alicante or Murcia, I'll pick you up, escort you to your villa and give you the gen, could cost you as little as £350 for 2, for 2 weeks. Worth it to get away from the snow! Even more wonderful :))

Budvar said...

Christmas at your place it is then, thanks for the offer. The weairnes will be pleased.

I told them we're staying with Santa this year at his place in Spain. I showed them your photo, and they said "That's not Santa, he smells of drink, isn't jolly and hasn't got a beard!!". I said "That's because he's in disguise, see the portly figure, the red face and snow white hair?". "He hasn't got snow white hair", they said, I told them "That's because he dyes it as part of his disguise, but it's a secret so make out you don't know who he is".

We'll be arriving at Murcia airport at 11:45 (Your time) so see you then...

Tiger said...

Do you cater for single folk ? I'd need someone ( female not ladyboy etc) to pump.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Excellent, Budvers. What day is that? If you've got weans, I will need to hire you somewhere @£150 p.w.!

Dark Lochnagar said...

Tiger, it's a catholic country, so they don't have Ladyboys.