Monday, 26 April 2010
C'MON THE BULL!
One of Spain's top matadors has been seriously injured in Mexico when a 1,100-pound bull gored him in the BOLLOCKS and hoisted him into the air, causing major blood loss.
Jose Tomas received a transfusion of 17 pints of blood after being gored Saturday by a beast named Navegante in the Mexican city of Aguascalientes.
Which reminds me of the times I used to go to Madrid on business. My business partner used to take me to a restaurant called 'Los Heuvos de los Toros'. The speciality of the house was BULLS' BALLS fresh from the PLAZA DE TOROS that day, well from the ones that had died anyway. These things were about the size of a TENNIS BALL and were fucking delicious, stewed in an onion gravy.
Anyway I arrived in Madrid late one Sunday night and not having eaten I went straight to the restaurant. There I told the waiter to bring me the BULLS' BALLS, as I was quite fluent in Spanish at the time. About 20 minutes later he arrived with a silver platter with the balls, but they were only the size of MARBLES.
I called over the Head Waiter to express my disgust at the size of them, only to be told, "Ah but Senor, ze Matador, he does not always win"!