Sunday, 20 December 2009

WOMEN WORSE AT PARKING THAT MEN-SCIENTIFIC STUDY CONFIRMS!



Women are slower and less accurate at parking than men, according to a scientific study that confirms the suspicions of many male motorists.

As part of the test 65 people were asked to park an Audi A6 family saloon in a standard-sized parking space.  Their manoeuvres – including head-on, reverse and parallel parking – were timed and rated for accuracy, which was judged by how far they kept the vehicle from the edges of the bay.  While the researchers expected the women volunteers to be slower, they were surprised to find that most of the time, their driving was shite.  The men however were slower at PUTTING ON LIPSTICK in their rear view mirror.


Dr Claudia Wolf from Ruhr University in Bochum, Germany, who led the study, said that the research confirmed previous findings that men have better co-ordination and spatial awareness than women, and take more risks behind the wheel,  "This is a massive failing by women.  Men have claimed that they knew they were BETTER DRIVERS than women and now this study CONFIRMS IT.  I am afraid to say that my studies confirm that MOST WOMEN should not be driving, unless it is PICKING THEIR MAN UP FROM THE PUB"!

16 comments:

subrosa said...

Why has nobody bothered to discover the real reason women can't reverse?

It's all to do with tits you see. The seat belt digs in like mad when you try to turn to see out the back window.

Then, for the more mature woman, it's to do with arthritis of the neck. Most men don't get that because theirs is mainly composed of brass. Hence the reason mothers know why boys haven't washed properly because they know what dirty brass looks like.

Am I doing ok for excuses?

Rab C. Nesbitt said...

ooooh! Subrosa said tits!

*faint*

tris said...

Aye Rab, I'll have to have a wee lie down.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Rosie, how dare you come on here and use words like tits! I don't know what your Granny would have said if she could have heard you! I don't come onto your blog, using profanities, so please try and have a bit of decorum, just because you're from Dundee, (although I believe it's the posh bit), you can't use that as an excuse! ;-)

Dark Lochnagar said...

Rab, take it easy son, I know you hear worse words in Morrisons. Rosie obviously got carried away!

Dark Lochnagar said...

Tris, I hope Rosie's bad language hasn't put you off visiting my blog. Your comments are always so astute and sweary word free.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Rosie, it may interest you to knoiw that such feminist luminaries such as Germaine Greer agree with you. I heard her on SKY news.

subrosa said...

DL, I'm sure Tris will support me in this but in the posh areas of Dundee tits is the word. I daren't tell you what it is in the east end or I'll be banned for life.

Ms Greer, oh please!! She'd say anything for a fast buck - I mean financial gain.

Just for info, my Granny called them bosoms. Why plural I don't know but she had awfy comfy bosoms and as a wee lass they were my pillow many a night.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Rosie, Funny you should mention that about bosoms. I've just started with a new dentist who's a reasonably young female and your head sticks into her big soft bosom when she does your teeth. Very, very comforting.

banned said...

Subrosa, did you not know that you are legally allowed to remove your seatbelt when reversing ? Hope that helps.

"researchers expected" ?WTF?; more fake research into the bleeding obvious, it's the result of all that hunter-gathering stuff while the ladies did the cooking and keeping the cave clean.

There was a 'scientific report' the other day that concluded that brown spirits were more likely to give you a hangover than clear ones. Oh fucking really ? I could have told them that for free from sometime in my late teens.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Banned, It's all a load of bollox about the size of their tits. My wife's got a right pair and it never bothered her reversing. Different story when she turns round in the middle of the night and you get slapped by one!

tris said...

Aye SR... I don't really know any other name for them. That's what they are called in what passes for polite society in Dundee.

My granny wouldn't have called them anything at all!!!

DL.. Well thanks, I must be your only sweary free zone, now that SR has returned to her Dundee roots. As such I'm a bit of a one off... I should probably have a preservation order slapped on me! Well something slapped on me anyways!

But thanks for the 'astute' bit. .... you're such a good judge! :¬)

Tiger said...

Did someone mention tits ?

Dark Lochnagar said...

Tiger, yes $900 million dollar tits. At least that's what your wife's will be worth if you don't get away with the shagging!

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