Wednesday 25 November 2009

DAVID BECKAM CAUGHT SNIFFING WIFE'S KNICKERS BEFORE PENALTY SHOOT-OUT!



Football superstar DAVID BECKHAM was last night pictured sniffing his WIFE'S KNICKERS before a penalty shoot-out with LA GALAXY.


To make POSH'S KNICKER SMELL more portable, MULTI MILLIONAIRE DAVID, has had the essence made into a spray which allows him to sew it into his football shorts for a quick sniff during a game.  The spray which was made in the WORLD FAMOUS, ODOUR LABORATORY OF L'OREAL is designed to give a FANNY ODOUR with one spray, whilst two sprays in quick succession gives off the odour of POSH'S ARSEHOLE.  The spray is designed to boost David's TETESTERONE LEVELS at certain times during the match when he might need a wee boost.


One unfortunate side affect which afflicts DAVID, is that unfortunately he finds it difficult to run around with a HARD-ON so he has to take certain harmless herbal remedies before each game.




If you have been harmed by any part of this report or feel that you might like to sniff an ARSEHOLE, please call 07813-487619 and ask for Jim, or alternately e-mail j.murphy@arseholesareme.com

8 comments:

Barking Spider said...

Jesus, DL, if that doesn't clear his head out by blowing his brain cell, then nothing will!

Oooh....the very thought has got the hairs on my arse cracking like whips!!

Dark Lochnagar said...

Is that the noise! I thought that bastard next door was roasting his chestnuts on the fire again!

ideas man said...

L'OREAL should market this idea worldwide. They would make a fortune. There must be many people like myself who would love to go down on Kate Winslet etc but could never afford it. Celebs would make a fortune by selling their fanny fat.
You could even have a MILFS range ( Lorraine kelly, Theresa May etc) and a gay range ( Graham Norton and Mandy etc).
They would have to fit straps though so you could pull your pud while sniffing.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Ideas man. Ah Lorraine Kelly, now that would do for me. Why would you need straps. Is your cock so big that you choke the chicken with both hands?????

INCOMING!!!!!!! said...

DL. Its a meme.

Dark Lochnagar said...

INCOMING!!!!!! I want recognition for the original concept then! ;-)

Lauren Simcock said...

PMSL.You're never rait DL.Keep up the good work :-}

Dark Lochnagar said...

Ansel, try my best. :-)