Wednesday, 30 September 2009

BROWN TO SUE RUGBY EYE-GOUGER

The Prime Minister, GORDON BROWN, is to sue the young man who gouged out his eye in 1967 whilst playing rugby.

Mr Brown has suffered untold misery after having three operations and having had to TAKE A POWERFUL COMBINATION OF PAIN-KILLING AND ANTI-DEPRESSANT DRUGS ever since.


The eye-gouger in person, a Mr Tam Mackintosh is reported as saying, "I am really sorry, if I had known who it was at the time and that he was going to go on and be the worst Prime Minister in history, I would have had the FUCKER'S OTHER EYE AS WELL!

Mr Brown is said to be taking Braille lessons from that other celebrated blind FUCK-WIT, DAVID BLUNKETT, who at least has never moaned about his disability like Brown and just went out and fondled some women, even if he couldn't see what they were like, ALTHOUGH IT SOMETIMES MEANS HE SHAGS HIS GUIDE DOG BY MISTAKE (or not).

9 comments:

CrazyDaisy said...

DL,

Saw Blunkett kissin ass last nite on Sky, I think, what a fuckin loser - why don't these incompetent cunts just call an election - Blunkett - pssst you wanna passport - legit - but it will cost ya a shag!

Yuch!

CD

Dark Lochnagar said...

Correct, why can't the blin' bastard go to a home and vegitate with all the other blin' bastards. Dog shagging arsehole.

Gigits said...

DL, you are one sick, twisted, incredibly funny individual! :-)

Anonymous said...

The gorgon looked like he could see quite well here. Seemed a bit upset though.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLYIQnpMQ_Y

Dark Lochnagar said...

Gigits, I don't know whether that's a compliment or not!

Dark Lochnagar said...

Anonymous, Excellent clip. Are you Sarah in disguise?

Barking Spider said...

You're not well, DL, but in a really good kind of way! LMAO

former anonymous said...

Aha you clocked me DL . Yes it's Sarah here. Did you see me " at conference" ? God I felt so horny after my 2 minute warm up. All that applause after speaking about my hero was awesome. Have to stop dropping my r's though. Especially with The Lord of the Ring still sniffing around. My built in dildo was going like a belt fed wombat during Gordon's speech. I won't tell you how we spent our time before dinner blush blush. Lets just say I had an extra cushion to sit on at dinner.

Dark Lochnagar said...

I could very near smell your excitement through the telly. Don't you think tou're a kinda good looking bird for that ugly bastard you're married to. Is it a power thing?