Monday 3 August 2009

BRITONS FAIL TO BEAT BIKINI RECORD THANKS TO P.M.

GORDON EVEN FUCKS UP A BIKINI COMPETITION!

IN Southend-on-Sea, Essex, 42 women are trying to break the world record for the number of women being photographed wearing bikinis in one place.

The current record is held by Russian women - 1,923 of them. Not all of them were lap dancers or gangsters molls sporting bikinis beneath thin black leather trench coats. A couple were actually on their way to the municipal baths.

The organiser of the event, a Mr G. Brown, who is currently on a two week holiday from a high-powered civil service job, said, 'WE WERE A WEE BIT UNLUCKY', 'WE ONLY FAILED TO BEAT THE RECORD BY A MARGIN OF 1,871.' 'It's not been my lucky year,' he added.


"THIS IS NOT A NEWS STORY BUT GRATUITOUS SEX, YOU DIRTY OLD BASTARD." Mrs Dark Lochnagar.

2 comments:

The Young Oligarch said...

The big blondie one in the pink gets my "vote" !

What's Hazel Blears doing there , though ? It's enough to put you off your roasted cheese .

Dark Lochnagar said...

Y.O. Roasted cheese at this time of night. No wonder your one of us insomniacs!