Russia must regain its pre-revolutionary status as the country with the best lavatories in the world, an official said on Wednesday, lamenting the current state of the country's lavatories.
He recalled that on April 9, 1699, Peter the Great published a trailblazing decree which made it a punishable offence to throw sewage into the street. "At that time you in Britain, were wiping your greasy arses with docken leaves. Before the Jewish Bolshevik Revolution, we had peasants, whose job it was to wipe arses" he explained
"But now we do not even have official regulations for the quality of public lavatories except a document from 1972 that talks about cesspits," he said, adding that Moscow had a "crying need for modern lavatories".
Sad to think that up until 30 years ago we were shitting ourselves that Russia would attack us. Now they're worried about their public Lavatories. Fuck me!
7 comments:
Mate, I was obliged to use Russian public lavs in Soviet times so please believe me that they were not to be recommended and that those in many restaurants and hotels were not much better.
The wooden doll is a luxury fantasy, they were mostly the "squat over a hole and shit" model.
I think the Russian Official, (nice to see they still employ people who look back fondly on the pre-revolutionary days when hunting peasants was good sport), probably gained his knowledge of British toilets from the scene in Trainspotting. Still, I have to admit I wouldn't be keen on using a public toilet, despite all those holes in the walls between cubicles for ventilation, (probably)!
I am surprised, thought such a fan of mistreating peasants should love the English aristocrats practice of throwing crap at the peasants. We still get it of course in the form of royal weddings and such.
Banned, how the fuck do they use one of those hole in the floor jobbies when they are pished most of the time :D
Antonio, I have to be perfectly honest and admit the peasant hunting bit, was my addition. How dare you criticise our young Prince Will. Hurrah! Hurrah! They've offered to let the State pay for their wedding but if they earn more than £22k, they're going to pay it back, not unlike our own peasant students. Hurrah! Hurrah!
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