Friday, 18 June 2010

WANT TO GET AHEAD IN BRITAIN? JOIN THE PUBLIC SECTOR!


Public sector employees work nine years less than their private sector counterparts but are paid 30 per cent more, a bombshell report reveals today.
Extraordinary research tells a tale of two Britains - a state sector awash with taxpayers' cash while the rest of the economy struggles to stay afloat.
Public sector workers enjoy better pay than those in the private sector, as well as better pensions, shorter hours, and earlier retirement.


When I was a boy, only NUMPTIES worked for the public sector.  As I start to contemplate retirement however, I'm rapidly coming to the conclusion that I'M THE NUMPTY!

21 comments:

INCOMING!!!!!!! said...

DL calm down. It's just fiscal lag. Give it 10 years maximum and everyone will be a serf on the state subsistence stipend. Though if you don't think appropriately you'll get your swipe card cancelled.

DL, remember how in the history books at school we were told how we Brits went out and enslaved the world, trashed India's cotton industry and stole it? Turned the dump into a wasteland. I don't remember there ever having been servants in my family but the history books say so, so there must have been herds of of-colour slaves and servants in the wee toons of Ayrshire at the turn of the century. The miners were famed for having fleets of coolies at their beck and call. Steel workers had wallahs pouring their 80shilling through squeezed angels' brains and caviar spirit. I never saw it myself, but the history books tell me that's how it must have been.

Well watch this space, what they say happened in India will in actuality take place here. This years Master Chef final was a great big piss take on that theme.

Dark Lochnagar said...

INCOMING!!!! All of which brings me onto another theory of mine. In all these countries that we 'enslaved', how many of them are actually doing better now. The answer is between none and fuck all. How many of them have the ordinary man in the street doing better. India? Yes if you are part of the right 'caste', you may get an education whereafter some Indian puckawallah will employ you to sit 12 hours a day in a call centre that he operates for a UK ompany and pay you a pittance but it is better than the fuck all pittance the serfs are earning so you are therefore 'middle class'. Until we get rid of the bankers and that fucker Rothschild and his cronies the world will be ever so.

Sgt Pepperspray said...

They will be crying when they realise that all that foriegn aid is coming out of their paypackets (all 10.5 Billion of it, plus admin costs).
We should scrap foriegn aid and replace it with one of two ideas.

1: Have a central charity fund that people can donate to tax free, then the reds can sit at home and gloat about how they are saving the poor unfortunates at their own expense and not mine ( and whilst we are at it tax tofu (whatever the rubbery shite is)and anything fair trade or decaff by a million percent)).

2: Have another live aid and get geldoff, ure, that baldy drummer cunt who morphs into a grilla and eats kraft chocolate, fuckwit george, george fuckwit micheal, bannarammma and shakin stevens. Put them all in a cage full of scorpions and deadly jellyfish and let em fight it out till no one is alive. Donate all the proceeds to non foriegn stuff.

3: turn Nigerian and get a job as a traffic warden.

4: Eat less ruffidge.

INCOMING!!!!!!! said...

Yes DL and I'll add another bit to the theorem. The mindboak that is CamClegg are continuing the work of Fuckwitz the OneBaller in several areas. E.g. Educashun!!! The conversation must have gone along the lines, "We are not giving you one penny to your dhimmi schools. No fukkin' way Allah Akbar. Your Abos are getting no education from our wealth. We want to set up our exclusive schools. You can do it because our Red friends brought so many of ours into the stinking piles of shit you called schools and lavished special needs on our children. But expect no gratitude. You are broke. So hand the schools over now or no cheques forthcoming. We've got real jobs unlike your Abos" CamClegg "OK anything you say. Suites us we hate the Abos just as much as you"

No real jobs DL, no nothing.

Sophia Pangloss said...

Ah can barely see fer aw the frothy foam in here. Jist as weel ah brought ma umbrella, tae stop ony o' yer slaverin spittle gettin oan ma hair.

Yer figures oan the puir private sector, an' their measly wee pay-packets are fine an' grand Mr Lochnagar. Ah wid expect nothin less fae a right-wing shop like the Policy Exchange. If it's that bad ye've got tae ask why onybody works in the private sector at aw?

The Young Oligarch said...

Far be it from me to quibble , DL , but , who are these super-cleaners making £37,003 ?

They must be dead good .

Also , private school teachers getting paid £25,938 to we evil public teachers' £32,859 ?

I've been interviewed for several jobs in the private sector (they didnae want me) and I found out that their salary scales were between 3 and 10 % better than the public sector . Right again , none of the really posh ones even considered me , so they could well be higher .

Could there be some statistical sleight of hand at play here ?

Dark Lochnagar said...

Sarge Pepperoni, of all your ideas, no2 appeals to me the most. I would pay good money to see that. Never mind all that shite that you see on SKY box office sports of a fight between two boxers you have never heard of, which disnae start until 3 in the morning and costs £20 to see two rounds, this is real entertainment. How can we organise it. I can't understand why Aid is ring fenced. I say in the good years give and in the bad don't, it's fucking simple.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Sophes, I think in the way that the public sector is growing everyone wants to be working there. Private pensions, don't make me laugh! 37.5 hour weeks, 6 weeks holidays plus public holidays, no unpaid overtime, earnings related pension, who the fuck wouldn't want some of that. Plus, plus almost 100% secure employment with no redundancy unless you get a package. Don't make me laugh.

Dark Lochnagar said...

INCOMING!!!! I think you should be in charge of education. It's funny how dimwitted some of these fucking politicians are. Up here they're changing the curriculum. Why? I don't know but someone thinks it's a good idea but the teachers don't seem to know what the fuck is going on. Mind you that doesn't surprise me.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Oli, ah so you are coming out as a teacher. Mmmm! The very fact that you didn't get the jobs in the private sector only goes to prove my point. No keep in the public sector and you'll retire a happy and rich man.

The Young Oligarch said...

What do you mean "coming out as a teacher" , DL ?

It's in my profile and I write about it now and again .

Not only that , but you and I have specifically discussed it on several threads .

Cutting down the dose of your medication appears to be in order .


I look forward to my impecunious retirement , although I'm positive that teachers in the private sector are no more or less well looked after in this regard .
They are , many of them , in the same scheme .

Pension scheme , that is .

The Young Oligarch said...

I meant to preview that , then stick in a link .

Here it is -

http://www.scis.org.uk/for-school-staff/teaching

Dark Lochnagar said...

Oli, I genuinely don't remember discusing it on threads but if you say we have that's good enough for me. I don't believe that teaching is an easy jobs, apart from the holidays and I know you have to work some of them and the hours and never really having to work at weekends and the salary linked pension scheme and the life asurance and the 'ill days' off and the well I could go on but I don't want to bore you!

Dark Lochnagar said...

Oli, fuck me! There's a head of dept job in Motherwell paying nearly £50k per year. In Motherwell! You better get your finger out and get applying for it. In the TES BTW!

The Young Oligarch said...

DL - I've been a head of a department , it didn't pay that .

The £47,862 job to which you refer is in an FE college anyway , not a school .

It is the only permanent job advertised in North Lanarkshire , an indicator , perhaps , of how many of us spend many years on temporary , often part-time , contracts .

You are , however , calculatedly ignoring my objections to the figures which you have published .

Were I a parent sending my child to a private school , I would be very concerned if its staff were paid less than the commissars at the local comp .

Peanuts ? Monkeys ?

As for the £37,003 cleaners in the private sector , any comments about how they make so much ?

These are transparently distorted statistics . I can't imagine why you are promoting them .

Dark Lochnagar said...

Oli, as you know when you do a blogpost, sometimes you have to play the devil's advocate to stimulate interest and that set of figures lifted straight out of the 'Mail' seems to have done the trick. I am sure they are distorted and will probably be figures for London as most of these things are. I did think of becoming a teacher about 20 years ago, but at the time there was no fast-tracking of candidates, so I didn't bother my arse. Maybe I should have done if they're paying £50K.

The Young Oligarch said...

DL -

As I've pointed out the £50k- job is in FE , not school teaching .

As for fast-tracking , it's never happened in Scotland and only to a very limited extent in England . Why you would want to fast-track in an all graduate profession is beyond me anyway .

There are always more teachers than jobs in Scotland , even in the good years , so the authorities don't need to entice people to join .

You're still ignoring the figures , though . Why's that ?

Dark Lochnagar said...

Oli, I thought the old fast tracking was all the rage at one time, but I suppose to many paedos applied. Of course there are more teachers than jobs and that's the way it should be, to keep teacher's on their toes and that way you can get rid of the bad ones. At least I suppose that's the way it was supposed to be, before they realised that the unions wouldn't let them get rid of the bad ones, so the slack was never taken up. So don't blame the Government for too many teachers, it's the fucking union's fault as usual. I am just imagining you sitting there shaking your head at that logic but sometimes it is necessary to think outside the box, that's why I would have made a good teacher, plenty of imagination or shitetalk as my wife calls it.

Figures? What figures could you be referring to?

The Young Oligarch said...

Certainly that is the logic for COSLA behind the permanent glut of trained teachers and the constant shrieks about shortages .

There is plenty the government can do about it , though , as they control the intake to the teacher-training colleges .

When I went through Jordanhill's endurance course , there were so many of us (dragged in to bring unemployment down) that all the courses were done in two shifts , morning and afternoon , to fit everyone in .

I'm sure you would make an excellent Modern Studies teacher , DL , pish being their stock in trade .

Exposure to the youth of today might not do the old ticker much good though , so consult the doctor first .

The Young Oligarch said...

PS - Impressive the way that you've avoided the central question throughout all this .

You're not Yvette Cooper ,are you ?

Dark Lochnagar said...

Oli, Modern studies. That would indeed be dead right for me. I've got a higher in it as far as I can remember so that's practically a degree nowadays the way that the marking has gone down. No, I am a man, but then again so is Yvette Cooper. What question is it that is worrying you? Can I allay your fears in any way?