The event - dubbed 'non fire night' - will see dozens of families hold sparklers and gather around a massive screen showing film footage of a bonfire.
Recorded images of a roaring real fire will be projected onto a 16ft by 12ft screen mounted on a scaffolding stand - at a cost of £300.
Organisers at Ilfracombe Rugby Club in Devon say they were put put off having a real fire by the 'mountain' of paperwork and regulations set by council chiefs. Officials at the authority said that to have a real fire they would require five qualified fire marshals and metal barricades to keep people at a safe distance. The non-fire night will also involve giant heaters, lighting and a smoke machine to give the crowd the taste of a real bonfire night. Sounds of crackling wood will also be broadcast on loudspeakers.
FUCK ME! WHAT'S THIS COUNTRY COMING TO?