ITALIAN MAN WINS LOTTERY

Italian man in purple scarf celebrates lottery win

MONTY TO TAKE OVER AS NEW ITALIAN PM

Respected former European Golfer of the year,Colin 'Monti' Montgomerie remains the top choice to try to steer the country out of its debt woes as the head of a transitional government, but Berlusconi's allies remained split over whether to support him.

However, 'the happy one', at one time dubbed, 'Mrs Doubtfire', by those ignorant American wankers, is the very man who can drag them out of the shite.

"They'll be no more Bunga-Bunga parties" said Monti, "but I will carry on with the traditional Italian shagging, although I'm not sure if I will go as young as 17.  I intend to bring in a law banning football, to punish the cheeky bastards for beating Scotland in qualifying for the last World Cup.  Pasta eating will also be banned and instead I will be introducing the mutton pie and deep fried Mars bars.  I will be shipping some of those arty pictures home for an exhibition in Govan, where the neds will be allowed to view them for nothing, in between glugs of Chianti, in order to confuse their sexual habits even more.

We will no longer be dictated to by that ugly Fraulein in Bonn and as a matter of fact if she can find an Italian man, it will be a miracle.  Mind you  a Scottish one would also be hard to find.  In future all scores between Scotland and Italy, will be 8-2 to the home side and if Italy doesn't let Andy Murray win the Italian open, they'll be hell to pay  Sorting out this lot will be a piece of pish, compared to winning the Ryder cup"!

TAKE AT LOOK AT THIS (SHORT) BERLUSCONI VIDEO-WHAT A PRICK!

HORNY AULD BASTARD!

 

I wish he was our PM, instead of that cold fish, Cameron!

IT'S NOT WORKING IN LIBYA!

UPDATE*5 INSTANCES OF NATO BOMBING INNOCENT CIVILLIANS*

Well here we are 4 months into our 'war' with Gaddafi.  We're a few weeks away from Ramadan, when most Arab countries will shut down, it being in the middle of summer this year.

We were told that Gaddafi and his family would have cracked by now, but his son has just made a broadcast on French TV saying that they'll never surrender.  As I've outlined on here before, the rebels are a ragtag army of misfits, from genuine Gaddafi haters to Islamic militants.  The only thing that appears to be cracking is the will of NATO to take the fight to the dictator's family.  The Italian PM Berlusconi, has said that he was against it from the start, the Germans are not committing any forces and most of the military might is from France and the UK.

Meanwhile our politicians are more wrapped up in a phone hacking scandal than the welfare of our troops, who if this 'war' is to be properly actioned will have to be sent in on the ground to help the so called rebels, who if they win against Gaddafi will be fighting us as we try and get our hands on their oil, which as we all know is the reason we're there in the first place!

I WISH BERLUSCONI WAS OUR PM- A REAL MAN -NOT LIKE THE NANCY BOYS WE'VE GOT.

Fourteen women named as guests in a sex probe involving Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi have been evicted from their homes after the residents association complained they ‘lowered the tone.’  The women all lived rent-free in the complex after being given the apartments by Berlusconi, 74, and were regulars at his infamous ‘bunga bunga’ sex parties.  (Does anyone know what a bunga bunga party is)?

Why is it in Italy, the male politicians are red blooded Heterosexuals like Berlusconi shagging young birds at 74 and all we've got is a bunch of sexually inadequate 'NANCY-BOYS', like Mandelson, Laws and Hague?  Nice to have someone, who doesn't give a fuck what anyone thinks, especially not some rug-munching Lesbian, or some fucking Health and Safety official worried about the strength of his condoms.  Melanoma?  Doesn't give a fuck!  He's almost tangerine.


Most men will tell you, that if, they had the choice of being Berlusconi or Clegg/Cameron, they would pick old Silvio, every time.