Much of the motorway was still closed yesterday as the Highways Agency came under renewed attack for not repairing the damage more quickly. The full six lanes will not reopen before the end of next week, meaning thousands of families will face Easter travel chaos.
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The Government has been forced to bring in EMERGENCY LEGISLATION, banning smoking anywhere within 100 Yards of a road. This along with new EU legislation banning smoking in cars where there are non-smoking passengers, has fueled the purchase of 4X4s, which are able to drive up the sides of high mountains in Scotland and Wales, above the tree line, where the owners are able to smoke with impunity. It is thought that the Scottish and Welsh Parliaments will be bringing in legislation taxing 'ALTITUDE SMOKING', as soon as they reconvene after the Election.
Scottish Labour Leader @ElmerGrayFudd told D.L., "we see this as one of the planks of our election. People have been saying that I am as thick as that plank, but that's all a matter of opinion and not unsurprisingly, I don't agree. But, then I couldn't possibly comment"!
5 comments:
Elmer, But is there a chance of you setting the shrubbery on fire. You must be above the tree line for the safety of yourself and anyone else who may be climbing said mountain!
Such an obvious fake.
The real Daily Fail article would read "thousands of HARDWORKING families will face Easter travel chaos."
DAFT BASKET, welcome to the blog. Yes, obviously the Journo who wrote that bit must have just come back from the pub and it was all he could muster after 8 pints.
Harbingers, I wouldn't argue with that. It's the way that they meekly accept it, that really annoys me. They stand back and believe all the shite they are fed. Take this Royal wedding. I have a theory that they've been told to have it, 6 days before the Scottish Election to damage the SNP and boost the pro-Unionist parties. "Oh they wouldn't do that", I told. Not fucking much they wouldn't, if it meant Scotland becoming independent and controlling the oil!
Banned, I think you may be right there. I remember a load of shite on the escalators the last time I was in London, but that was after they banned smoking.
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