Tuesday, 5 July 2011


With everything from cheese and petrol to leg-waxing and mobiles, you might have thought Tesco had exhausted all the possible products it could offer its customers.
Not so. Yesterday, the supermarket announced it is to start selling double glazing.
It hopes to become a major player in the double glazing sector, teaming up with nationwide handyman firm Job Worth Doing to offer its own range of windows, doors and conservatories.

As you know, I fucking hate supermarkets, but particularly those greedy globalist fuckpigs, TESCOS! If they had their way, there would be a Tescos in every village and town in the UK.  Not content with putting every small business around out the game, they're now moving into double-glazing and undertaking.  Make the bastards close at 8pm, there's fuck all on their shelves after 7pm anyway and don't let them open on a Sunday.  Oh, and stop the bribery which they perpetrate all over the country to get into a town by offering to build civic centres and even police stations.  If they were a person, I'd assassinate the bastard!


Billy said...

It is a person nd you are not DL so assassinate away.

All the proof you need:


Dark Lochnagar said...

Billy, interesting video if a wee bit 'dusty'. That info would be better presented by someone with a bit of charisma!

Anonymous said...

A bit far for you freeloaders, but, if you get the chance - visit the wonderful high street shopping facility in the Devon town of Seaton, you'll have to be quick because they are building a TESCOs right slap bang in the centre of town.
They got planning permission in return for building a leisure centre.
Where I come from, and possibly where you come from, that's called BRIBERY.

bugsbunny said...

What do you mean Freeloaders you jumped up Cornish Pixie? GTF.


Toni said...

DL, Phillip Clarke has clearly learned from the Sam Walton school of retailing. The company could kindly be described as "assertive". Slough has what is the largest Tesco I have ever seen. I have never been into it,but it is almost offensive to drive past it. Even more insidious is their strategy of creating a store for every market sector and the worthless loyalty program that tracks every one of their consumers spending habits.
Also the food they supply is rubbish anyway.

Joe Public said...

Nobody's forced to shop at Tesco.

If people didn't, they have gone bust years ago.

Jack Cohen started off with a single shop.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Anonymous, They do the same all across the country, they've even built police stations!

BTW, just because you Cornishmen aren't assertive enough to govern yourselves as many want, don't blame us. Mind you I used to like a good pasty when I was a fat bastard.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Stephen, don't rise to the bait, they're only jealous. Wait until they discover oil off the Cornish coast!

Dark Lochnagar said...

Antonio, on the odd occasion in the past when I've shopped there, I've found their stuff OK, but if I'm ever in a Supermarket, (which is rarely), it's Asda, which I estimate to be about £20 cheaper for the usual shop. I ended up in Sainsburys today because the wife wanted some fucking tinned apples for some recipe and we ended up spending £80+!

Dark Lochnagar said...

Publes, I might have known there would be a Jew behind it somewhere!

boring story but true all the same said...

I've only been to our new tesco once and never went back. I bought a kettle which said it was £20 on the shelf. The checkout said £35. I was directed to customer services who said it wasn't priced on the shelf so they couldn't sell it. Basically they had priced the kettle wrongly. When found out they claimed they had forgotten to price it so couldn't sell it. That was a couple of years ago so assuming I spend about £200 a month on food then they've lost about £5,000 from me for being total cocks.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Borer, I don't suppose that will bother them. I was talking to a mate across the road tonight about this and he was telling me his Brother in Law does all his shopping at Tescos, insurance, clothes, petrol (always 2p dearer than Asda), papers, flowers. The fucker should be given a hefty kick in the crutch for being such a fuckwit.

banned said...

I was chatting with a lady from Gerrards Cross recently, she was cross with Tesco for "ripping the heart out of our town by building a store in the middle of it".
She went on, all the small shops closed down years ago (? Tescos fault?).
She and her friends are making a stand though, by driving to nearby sunny Beaconsfield and shopping at...

Tesco opened a large new store outside Crediton a couple of years ago including a petrol station though the olsd one still seems to be doing well.
Last time I went past it I noticed a new pew pub, the Red Deer; looks a bit souless I murmered to my companion who repiled "Yer right, who wants to drink in a Tesco car park?" LOL.

Dark Lochnagar said...

Banned, yes the problem is that it's much easier to shop at a supermarket and it takes persistence to shop at a wee local shop.

What I hate most about Tescos is their aggresive policy of building stores and not only that but they are building 'spar' type stores in town centres to fuck the wee man even more. They should be controlled only being allowed to open 6 days a week, (as with all shops), and shutting and opening later.