Sunday, 31 July 2011

GADADAFI SAYS "GET YOU FINGER OUT AMERICA OVER DEBT"!



Muhammar Gaddafi has tonight pleaded with the American Government to solve the debt crisis talks.

Colonel Gaddafi made the request on the Al Jazzeera network.  The full quote said, " I Muumaar Gaddafi, the humble son of a goatherd, request that my black ally Mr George W Bush and his dad, Mr Bush Senior, the man  who humbled Saddam Hussein will work together to  get those crazy, son of bitches in the Congress to vote for a debt ceiling change.  I Muumaar Ggaddafi pledge to sell much oil to save mighty Dollar and free the world".

Foreign spokesman, Hilary Clinton told Muummaar Gaddafffi, "to go and fuckkkk himself" in a slurred expression of support for her husband that "fuckpig Clinton", seemingly unaware that he left politics, many years ago and is now banging the Filipino maid when she is away on State department business.

Friday, 29 July 2011

GADDAFI SHOULD BE LET OUT ON COMPASSIONATE GROUNDS

I think Gaddafi should be let out of Libya on compassionate grounds and here's why.

If you consider these two photos, you will notice than either Gaddafi has got a body double or he has a cancerous tumour erupting from his face to the bottom left of his nose.  Now, I don't think the good Colonel is aware of it yet and even if it's not cancerous, he should still be let out to some nice, warm place, as he is undoubtedly the ugliest fucker ever to lead a country since Maggie Thatcher.

I mean I could imagine if you were a woman you'd let old Bunga, Bunga man from Italy give you one, even if he wasn't a multi-millionaire.  I would have given that Paki woman that got shot one and as you know, there are one or two in the Labour party on both sides of the border, I could quite fancy.

But Gaddafi?  Even if he wasn't covered in flies from the desert, I could never visualize getting shagged by him, if I was a woman, if you see what I mean!

Thursday, 28 July 2011

REMEMBER THAT SHITE ABOUT US, "ALL BEING IN IT TOGETHER"?

Remember all that shite about us, "all being in it together"  Well the villa above is the place where our esteemed leader Mr Cameron and his wife are going on holiday.  £10,000 per week.

Now I well remember last year when he showed us he could do it on the cheap with a shite place in Spain.  Maybe it was Cleggy jetting off to Cloisters at every opportunity or Georgy enjoying the hospitality of his good mate Nat Rothschild, (yes him from the Jewish banking dynasty), along with his other mate Pete Mandelson and Brazilian boy friend.  Blair liked his Tuscan villa as much as the next man too.  At least Brown was too tight fisted or was it a statesman like awareness of not offending the people of Kirkcaldy, that made him stay at home or perhaps the sight of him in his 'Speedos' would have been too much for the country.

Anyway, the point I am trying to make with all this rambling is that our elected leaders love to rub our faces in it at all times.  Where are you going on holiday this year?  I would suggest most people will be staying at home and trying to pull their horns in.  I know I would have been had not my in-laws dies at the beginning of the year leaving us a few bob.

It makes a mockery of Harold Wilson, who insisted on hiring a cottage in the Scilly Isles every year.  But like him or as I did, loathe him, at least they were 'real' politicians who didn't rub their voters noses in it.  Cameron and the rest will be in power probably no more than 5 years and I do think that, although everyone deserves a holiday,  they could have holidayed in this country.  They have plenty of time after that to to travel the globe selling their autobiography. 

Wednesday, 27 July 2011

Tuesday, 26 July 2011

WHO ACTUALLY GIVES A FUCK ABOUT MANDELA?


Just a week after Nelson Mandela celebrated his 93rd birthday, his family have announced that he has left his Johannesburg home and plans to live out the rest of his life in his country retreat in Qunu, near the Eastern Cape village where he grew up.

Who gives a fuck?  He could end his life fucking goats for all I am concerned and it would not make, one whit of difference to me!

Why do we defer to these fuckers?   In his case he is a terrorist.  Now, I don't say that his cause is not just and may have some merit, just that he is an old prick!  He fauns about like a roe deer which has just been shot!  Fuck off and die Mandela, and let those other S. African fuckers steal the land from the only people able to get any production from it, the Whites!  Sorry, I can't call them that, without calling the Blacks, Black, and that wouldn't be allowed.  Oh, and take your fucking stupid shirts with you!

Sunday, 24 July 2011

NUTJOB FILLS 22 TROLLEYS WITH DRINK IN A SUPERMARKET THEN CAN'T PAY!

It was a good idea at the time. A few packets of crisps and a few drinks. And then just escalated from there.
This shopper filled these trolleys with thousands of pounds worth of crisps and drinks before he got to the checkout and his card was declined - leaving staff to put it all back.
Three members of staff at the Morrisons store in Barry, South Wales, had helped the man fill 22 trolleys with £3,338 worth of spirits, beer and fizzy drinks before packing the items for him after he told them it was for a charity do.
The store had even opened a new till aisle and publicised the charity event on their announcement system before his bank card was repeatedly rejected.
Mr Ware said: 'He said he wanted to do quite a large shop for a raffle on the waterfront with balloons and inflatables to raise money'
A store spokesman said: 'It turned out he had some mental illness problems - he meant well.'

FUCKING CLASSSIC!

Friday, 22 July 2011

MOSSAD SUSPECTED OF BOMBING IN NORWAY

Police in Norway suspect the Israeli intelligence (?), service, MOSSAD, of carrying out a bombing in Oslo which was initially blamed on Islamists.

The Prime Minister's office appears to be the target.  It's thought the bombing may be an attempt to deflect attention away from the Zionist, Rupert Murdoch, who has been in the news all over Europe.

Wednesday, 20 July 2011

INTERESTING ARTICLE ON MURDOCH AND HIS POWER OVER POLITICIANS

Interesting article here on Murdoch and his influence over the 'Political Class'.

ARE WE TAKING OUR EYE OFF THE BALL?


With all this phone-hacking/the Monster Murdoch, shite which seems to be involving about 75%  of all MSM stories currently, are we taking our eye off the ball?

I believe that it is the first duty of a civilised society to look after the old and ill and to educate their young.  SOUTHERN CROSS HEALTHCARE, a private health company have just gone tits up.  They own a substantial number of care homes all across the United Kingdom with over 37,000 residents.  Now the first question we should be asking is, should private companies be allowed to provide healthcare?  That's the question these care home  residents, (the ones not suffering from dementia that is) and their relatives will be asking.  If we have to pick up the bill for these homes where does that leave the concept of private healthcare in the UK?  SOUTHERN CROSS are still running a  website which is where the photo came from.  They also tell us that:

"Looking for a care home can be a daunting task. However, choosing a home with consistently high standards of care for an older relative or a loved one with a disability is often the right choice and the best choice for them. In our Care Homes around the country we provide a supportive, enabling environment that encourages independence and individuality.
Our experienced team at Southern Cross can assist you with the many questions that you will have when it comes to finding the right home, the right type of care and how to find the right advice about funding".  Aye right!


In England, students are being told that they are going to be charged £9,000 per year for their education at university.  In Scotland we have a different attitude, I believe, to that of England.  We believe that our young people should not pay to go to University and not only that, but anyone from outside the country wants to come to University here,  should pay, but unfortunately due to some strange anomalies in the EU system, it is only students from the rest of the UK who pay.  The media in England is trying to turn this into a, 'anti-English, Scottish Government' issue, which it's not as we want to charge all non-Scots.  We in Scotland tend to have the same attitude to our ill, which again to my mind is commendable.

So as we head towards another global meltdown, the phone hacking scandal agenda seems to be being promoted only by journalists and politicians.  It doesn't have the same meaning to the general public, as the MPs' expenses scandal, IMO and I think most of you would agree, that the quicker, our elected representatives, get rid of it and get back to things that really matter to the us, the better.

Monday, 18 July 2011

SEE, I TOLD YOU ABOUT WEATHER IN SCOTLAND!


And this is what we laughingly call summer!

FURTHER TO MY LAST POST-CHINESE MAN WINS BEE BEARD AWARD


Fuck Rebekah Brooks, the Murdochs and the police commissioner, what about this twat in China attracting 24kg of bees, wearing only a pair of swimming shorts and some goggles.  Now this is real news!

IS IT JUST ME-OR IS ANYONE ELSE PISSED OFF?


It's not the easiest thing in the world running a blog, even a shite one like this.

At the moment there just seems nothing worthwhile writing about.  Oh, yes, we've got the hacking scandal, but I think everyone is bored to death with that.  Libya?  Gaddafi lives in a tent and the most sophisticated of weapons that NATO have, can't find him.  Fuck off!  Its OK bombing Gaddafi forces who are of course, of his tribe and loyal to him, but not the Muslim extremists that make up most of the rebel forces.
  

The weather?  Pish, as usual.  Scottish Parliament?  In recess.  Sport?  Football not started yet.  Celebs?  No, can't be arsed.  Greek debt crisis?  If you've got any money, get it into gold bullion that you can hold in your hand, (gone up 7% this year alone).

Me?  I'm thinking of moving to Spain on a permanent basis.  I love Scotland, but the weather is getting me down and if I don't make a move now, I'll probably regret it for the rest of my life.  

Ach well, moan over!

Saturday, 16 July 2011

IF I GIVE YOU ONE BIT OF ADVICE THIS YEAR THIS IS IT!

If I give you one piece of decent advice this year my friends, it's this.

Get onto a company that makes claims for PPI mis-selling, (there's plenty out there) and get them onto your credit cards.  It's been about 6 months, but that's our third one paid up to the tune of £3,600.  It's a large store based credit card but my only regret is it wasn't Tescos.  All in all, we've had £5,600 paid back between the three of them.  OK, the debt company takes 25%, but as my old father was prone to say, 100% of fuck all, is still fuck all.

I can give you the name of the company who is working for me if you want.

Friday, 15 July 2011

ETHNIC JOKE


An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a
German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner, a New
Englander, and a Californian)an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a
Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New
Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a
Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a
Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a
Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a
Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a
Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a
Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a
Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a
Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an
Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a
Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an
Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a
Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ecuadorian, a Costa
Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a
Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47 Africans walk into a fine
restaurant....









"I'm sorry," said the maître d', after he had scrutinized the group one 
by one and barred their entrance saying.... 
 
 

"You can't come in here without a Thai."

THE PUPPET KING! STILL, BTW.

KELLY BROOK SPOTTED TAKING A DIP IN THE FIRTH OF CLYDE

KELLY BROOK ON BOARD YACHT JUST OFF TROON BEACH

POLITICIANS ARE SHITING THEMSELVES OVER MURDOCH'S REVENGE!

Interviewed on BBC Radio 4's Today programme, Mr Clegg was asked whether he believed Murdoch, the News Corporation CEO, was a "fit and proper person" to own media in this country.
Clegg replied: "Clearly, there are big questions about the fitness and properness of News International. That is exactly why Ofcom are now looking at it. 

It seems to me that the politicians have decided they had better finish Murdoch off, because like a wounded lion, if they don't, he will come back and bite them hard.  So with all three main, British parties' leaders having spoken against him, who would he support now, if there was an election?  UKIP?  So if we ever got a vote on the EU, would it be the 'Sun wot got us out'?


Does he even hold that much sway nowadays?  I think that politicians who don't think the moronic, British public aren't swayed by what they read in their daily comic, are fooling themselves.  There are people in this country who think 'soaps' are real, FFS!

Wednesday, 13 July 2011

WOMAN CUTS OFF HUSBAND'S PRICK AND THROWS IT IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL!

A woman has been arrested after drugging her husband and tying him to his bed before cutting off his penis and throwing it into the garbage disposal, it has been reported.


Mind you if I was married to an evil looking fucker like her, I don't think I'd miss it!

Monday, 11 July 2011

IT'S NOT WORKING IN LIBYA!





Well here we are 4 months into our 'war' with Gaddafi.  We're a few weeks away from Ramadan, when most Arab countries will shut down, it being in the middle of summer this year.

We were told that Gaddafi and his family would have cracked by now, but his son has just made a broadcast on French TV saying that they'll never surrender.  As I've outlined on here before, the rebels are a ragtag army of misfits, from genuine Gaddafi haters to Islamic militants.  The only thing that appears to be cracking is the will of NATO to take the fight to the dictator's family.  The Italian PM Berlusconi, has said that he was against it from the start, the Germans are not committing any forces and most of the military might is from France and the UK.

Meanwhile our politicians are more wrapped up in a phone hacking scandal than the welfare of our troops, who if this 'war' is to be properly actioned will have to be sent in on the ground to help the so called rebels, who if they win against Gaddafi will be fighting us as we try and get our hands on their oil, which as we all know is the reason we're there in the first place!

Saturday, 9 July 2011

PHONE HACKING-DOES ANYONE REALLY GIVE A FUCK?

THE MAD MEN
I've listened to all this pish about phone hacking and the News of the World for weeks, but does anyone really give a fuck?

So OK, hacking Milly Dowler's phone was out of order and also the dead soldiers', but politicians and celebs?  I don't think so.  We all feed on salacious gossip.  I admit I try my best to ignore it, but like most men when I'm scanning a paper on line and a celebs tits pop up, I have, sometimes,  to have a wee look.

I would imagine that most of the 'b' list celebs, will be rubbing their hands together at the thought of getting a few bob from Murdoch.  He'll shut down the News of the World and the 'Sunday Sun' will start and it's readership will after a few weeks be equal to the News of the World, because the same brain dead morons will read it, hoping to get a bit of excitement into their dreary lives by living Kerry Katona's, or whatever her name is.

Life will go on and within a few months, Murdoch and his crew will once again be invited to Downing Street and Party Conferences because he's bought and paid for most of the politicians in this country.  So believe me, nothing will change.  Oh yes, they'll be a lot of hoohaaing in the media, particularly the BBC, who are loving having the spotlight taken off them.  But in three years time will there have been any legislation curbing the power of the newspapers?  
I won't  hold my breath!

Friday, 8 July 2011

THE BULLS RUN IN PAMPLONA-CAN YOU IMAGINE IT HAPPENING IN HEALTH AND SAFETY BRITAIN?


The Bull run in Pamplona, Spain has been going on for decades, immortalised by Ernest Hemingway in 1926.  Thousands come from all over Spain, (and Europe),  to participate in the Festival of St Fermin.

Can you imagine it going on in Britain?  We are so tied up in Health and Safety, that we cancel rolling cheeses down a hill, for fuck's sake.  Murray Mound at Wimbledon was closed off when it rained in case someone slipped!  What is it about this country.  Employers complain that they are so tied up in H&S legislation that they can't operate their businesses and are not employing as many people as they could.

The animal rights people will say that it's cruelty to the bulls.  Bollox, they're cows.  We eat the bastards, how cruel can that be?  I like animals as much as the next man and have always kept either dogs or cats, which I spoil, but they don't have rights, unless I give them some.  In Spain, they have a novel approach. Unlike here, they actually treat their children better than their animals, whereas here, it's often the other way round.  I'll tell you one thing about Spain.  Their dogs might have fleas now and again, but you don't get the same levels of child abuse as you get here and when do you ever remember in Spain, coming up against cheeky wee bastards, like you find here?

OUCH! THAT HAS TO HURT!

Thursday, 7 July 2011

YOUNG WOMEN FLOCK TO SHEEP SHAGGING CLASSES IN THE HIGHLANDS!

Some 'land girls' shave a sheep, getting ready to shag it, during 2nd WW
Women have made up almost half of the students on a sheep shagging course held to encourage more young people to become qualified shaggers.

Four women and six men have been learning to shag sheep.

The course's costs were paid for with money from a community benefit fund which wind farm operators pay into.

Well I'm glad that money from the 'renewables' industry is being put to good use, training Highland people the long lost art of sheep shagging.  This is something that is handed down from father to son and mother to daughter.  Modern day inventions such as the 'wool-snaggle' remover have played a major part as well.  It is used to remove those wee smelly bits of wool from the sheep's arse before full sex can begin.

The large influx of Polish sheep shaggers since they joined the EU has also helped keep a traditional skill alive.  The Poles, unfortunately  tend to be tougher on the sheep, often cutting their throat afterwards to stop them from cliping to other members of the flock and this has reduced the sheep shagging stocks, as only some breeds are suitable, like the Horned Black Faced variety, which gives you something to hang onto during the shag.

Wednesday, 6 July 2011

1400 BRITISH JOBS GO BECAUSE THEY AWARD A CONTRACT TO SIEMENS IN GERMANY!

This is the Bombardier, Canadian owned, railway carriage building company in Derby.  Bombardier had just axed 1,400 jobs at its Derby plant after failing to win a contract. Not any contract, either, but one awarded by the British Government to build 1,200 train carriages for the Thameslink commuter service into London. Having assessed the bids, ministers awarded the £1.5 billion prize to a consortium led by Germany’s Siemens. 

How the fuck does that make sense?

Now I know that under EU rules they have to go with the most competitive bid, but what does it cost to throw 1400 workers on the scrapheap?  Should that not be added to the price of the contract?  Could you imagine the same thing happening in France?  Or Germany?

No, me either.  The whole thing is a load of shite and the sooner we're out of it the better!

FIRST PICS OF MAID IN STRAUSS-KHAN RAPE RELEASED


This is a picture of the maid in the Strauss-Khan rape case, which has shown to be a load of bollox.  I mean, what man would let an ugly bastard like this, give him a blow-job? 

Where would you put your cock?

Tuesday, 5 July 2011

TESCOS-GREEDY GLOBAL FUCKERS!

With everything from cheese and petrol to leg-waxing and mobiles, you might have thought Tesco had exhausted all the possible products it could offer its customers.
Not so. Yesterday, the supermarket announced it is to start selling double glazing.
It hopes to become a major player in the double glazing sector, teaming up with nationwide handyman firm Job Worth Doing to offer its own range of windows, doors and conservatories.

As you know, I fucking hate supermarkets, but particularly those greedy globalist fuckpigs, TESCOS! If they had their way, there would be a Tescos in every village and town in the UK.  Not content with putting every small business around out the game, they're now moving into double-glazing and undertaking.  Make the bastards close at 8pm, there's fuck all on their shelves after 7pm anyway and don't let them open on a Sunday.  Oh, and stop the bribery which they perpetrate all over the country to get into a town by offering to build civic centres and even police stations.  If they were a person, I'd assassinate the bastard!

Monday, 4 July 2011

LABOUR TAKE INVERCLYDE!

KOFI ANNAN PRAISES SCOTS' POTENTIAL


Kofi Annan praises Scotland's potential

Kofi Annan 
Kofi Annan said Scotland had "great potential" for the future
Scotland can play a leading role in ending poverty and tackling climate change, according to former United Nations Secretary General Kofi Annan.
He said Scotland was "a country with a great history in science, technology, research, economics and in business".
Too right Bother Annan!  You're even named after a place in Scotland.  Perhaps one of your ancestors got shagged by a Scotsman and the name stuck in the family?

Sunday, 3 July 2011

WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO SPEND 3 MINUTES OF MY LIFE WATCHING THIS PISH ON BBC?

Tonight watching the BBC news, I had to endure 3 minutes of some fucking twat in the Monaco Royal Family, marrying some fuckwit photocopier salesman's daughter.

Can anyone tell me why???

Saturday, 2 July 2011

BEER SHAMPOO STOPS BEING PRODUCED AFTER GOVERNMENT INTERVENTION!

Time has finally been called on Linco beer shampoo.

Manufacturers Church & Dwight said that after intervention by the UK Government over liver damage, the time had come to stop producing the product.

Minister of Health, Andrew Landsley has welcomed the announcement.  "We felt that the public should be protected from this product as some of them clearly felt that it was an alcoholic drink instead of a shampoo.  We have seen several patients admitted to A&E with very clean livers, whilst their hair was, in many cases, greasy as fuck". 

A patient who didn't want to be identified but is thought to come from Liverpool, said, "I used to drink 6 packets a night and even more at the weekend.  It's a lovely thick drink and always has an extra creamy head.  I don't know what I'll do now, probably having to drink that shitey Stella". 

Iman Hakim for Birmingham Mosque told us, "we in the Muslim faith are pleased that this vile product has been withdrawn from sale.  Some of our devout followers had been tempted into the ways of the Devil by licking it, as it dribbled down their faces, while they were shampooing their hair.  It will save us having to issue the call for a holy war to right the wrongs done against Islam by the Christian shampoo industry".

Friday, 1 July 2011

IS IT WORTHWHILE GOING TO UNIVERSITY?


"More than a third of recent graduates are unemployed or languishing in stop-gap jobs that do not need a degree, official figures show. 
Students have been running up debts only to find themselves jobless or doing work for which they are over-qualified. 
One in ten of last year’s graduates – 20,000 – are unemployed and more than a quarter are in dead-end jobs".

So is it worthwhile going to University?  I left School at the end of sixth year with reasonable qualifications and was accepted into 2 Universities, which for younger readers, wasn't the norm in the mid 70s.  I decided to continue working in the family business which over the years until 1990, I expanded considerably, eventually turning over £6m with 40 employees.  

Unfortunately it went tits up in 1990 for various reasons which I won't bother going into, but although I've mostly been self employed in various guises since then, it is a regret of mine now, that I didn't go to Uni.  At the time it was the right decision and I should probably taken the opportunity to go back in 1991 or so, but as I was skint, with financial commitments taken on when I had a successful business, I had to continue working full time.  I should probably as well, gone bankrupt, but I didn't.  Looking back now, I should have probably joined the Police or the Civil Service and got a nice cushy pension.

If I had any children, I would tell them to go to University to study Law or Accountancy, because I've met some thick fuckers in both fields making plenty of dosh.  Or for that matter become a plumber or a joiner and who would have said that 30 years ago with the advent of DIY.  It just goes to show that proper training pays off.  Mind you, how the fuck, can it take 5 years to train to be a plumber?  6 months top, unless gas boilers are factored in.  Would I want to be lumbered with £50k student debt?  Probably not, but fortunately, I live in a country where our major priorities are looking after our old and sick and educating our children.  I just wish they stayed in Scotland and put the skills paid for by us to the betterment of Scottish society.