Thursday, 30 April 2009

Political Correctness-why do we need it.


Is it just me or is anyone else fed up with POLITICAL CORRECTNESS?


We fanny about trying to be so PC it is ridiculous. We can't even say, that Black guy over there. We've got to say, that guy in the yellow shirt or whatever. If the guy's black so what, he's black, probably a very nice guy, maybe not. Exactly the same as white guys, Jewish guys, Germans, Muslims, Women, French, English and even maybe Homosexuals, (just kidding).


But the fact that I have to add just kidding, shows that I am frightened of not being thought of as hip or with it or whatever shite they say now.


But I'm 54 and I don't to the best of my knowledge know many Homosexuals, but the ones that I have met, similar to many heterosexual men, make me feel uncomfortable. I don't however feel uncomfortable around women, although I am no great catch, or so my Wife tells me!


I'm not saying it is any-one's fault that they are different from me, it's just a fact that they are.


As soon as we post comments on Newspaper on line stories if we use any word that might be "offensive", i.e. twat, shite or Jew, we are censored. (They particularly don't like Jewish comments). Any story about Israel or Palestine is not allowed to be commented on for some reason. These are all words that are used in real life. If someone calls me a fat Scotch Git, I'll tell them to fuck off, not run off to some Police Station and waste their time.
Sorry if I seem to be rambling, but post was brought on by this fucking arsehole at the top of the page, who killed a child whilst driving a car without a license or insurance. He is also an illegal asylum seeker who is on his second appeal against deportation.
THROUGH THE MUSLIM FUCKER OUT BEFORE HE KILLS ANYONE ELSE!

Wednesday, 29 April 2009

EXSPENSES AND BROWN'S CAVE-IN

OLD MUGABROON MUST BE HAVIN A LARF!

With a Government mired in sleaze allegations, the Great White Leader, who is by the way, flying round the World looking for photo-opportunities, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Poland, has failed in his YOUTUBE attempt to get MPs to change their greedy ways.

Former Minister "Piggy" Clarke said the way Mr Brown had issued his plans to reform expenses – which was a matter for MPs rather than the government – had undermined the Prime Minister."He's got to not bully in the way that he goes about it," he said. "I thought this kind of diktat that came from the YouTube video simply was not the right way to go.

So there you go Gordon, your attempt to get the country's mind off your disastrous handling of the Economy HASN'T WORKED!

WATCH OUT FOR A LASER PRINTER HEADING YOUR WAY SOON, PIGGY!

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

GREEDY SWINE FEVER REACHES SCOTLAND


THE HEAD SWINE WAS OFF TO AFGHANISTAN TO SPREAD "GREEDY" SWINE FLU TO THE TROOPS.
As if the poor Bastards don't have enough to contend with, some stupid BASTARD, wearing a suit, as usual, addresses the troops in the boiling sun. Do they not have camouflage fatigues to fit he FAT BASTARD.
WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE TALIBAN WHEN YOU NEED THEM.
He's fat and he's wearing a black suit, YOU CAN'T MISS THE TWAT! (If you can't hit his twat just shoot him anywhere).
The rest of the GREEDY SWINE FLU BUNCH will be indoors in their SECOND HOUSES, five miles from WESTMINSTER, counting their expenses.
YES! I MEAN YOU BASTARDS! YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!

Sunday, 26 April 2009

SCRAPPAGE-IS YOUR CAR/GOVERNMENT PAST IT'S BEST?


ANOTHER BAG OF SHITE FROM VAUXHALL
SCRAPPAGE-What a brilliant fucking idea from this bunch of NUMPTIES that we call a Government.
How the fuck is it going to help our industry when 85% of all our cars are imported.
"Oh", says Darling. "It works well in Germany". Yes you TWAT, that's because they only import a small fraction of their cars and no self respecting Kraut, unlike us, would dream of buying a car that was not made in the Fatherland.
So when they decide to have another go at us, they will be able to turn their car factories over to TANK PRODUCTION and this time we will be crushed by the German boot. (OK, I may be going a bit over the top)!
p.s. Don't ever contemplate buying a Vauxhall, not even the little one pictured at the top of page, BECAUSE THEY ARE A LOAD OF SHITE!!!!!!

Saturday, 25 April 2009

Gordon and Cherie


BROWN AND BECKETT IN ALLEGED LOVE TRYST

There are whisperings tonight from around Westminster of an alleged LOVE TRYST between Prime Minister, GORDON BROWN and one of his senior Ministers, MARGARET BECKETT.

The two have allegedly been seen sneaking around in some of the Seediest Hotels in London with two Security men in tow.

A Labour insider was allegedly quoted as saying, " this has been going on for years". "Gordon is a sexual animal". "Their relationship started over a mutual love of caravans and camping". "Margaret likes caravaning and Gordon in the nineties was said to be camp". But now, there is nothing Gordon likes more than to give Margaret a good going over with the "Red Book". "She's even been known to take her teeth out on occasion".

"He was also shagging Cherie Blair for years", he added.

A prominent Labour Politician, told us "this is bigger than John Major and what-do-you-call-her". "Gordon will reveal anything to keep the Country's mind off the Budget, he's a FUCKING ARSEHOLE".

Memo to Iain Gray. Your Taxi is waiting outside. When you're in a hole, STOP DIGGING!



Wednesday, 22 April 2009

Budget Woes

ALISTAIR LAYS A SILENT BUT DEADLY FART AS HE ANNOUNCES THE DEFECIT
WE'RE ALL FUCKING DOOMED, DOOMED, I TELL YOU!
The figures are ASTRONOMIC. We are going to borrow, (if Darling's projected figures are right and anyone wants to lend to us), £707 BILLION over the next 5 years. That will take on his projections, which have been totally wrong so far, until 2017 to bring the budget back into control.
Everyone in the UK will have a share of the national debt amounting to £49,789 each.And Brown sits there smiling, when the majority of this is his fault due to his restructuring of the financial regulations in 1997.Never mind shooting Fred the Shred, what about Brown the Clown. Where are all the assassins when you need them?

Budget Jitters and sex in Penrith

JACQUI SMITH'S HUSBAND MISSING FOR 48 HOURS

The London Evening No-Standards has reported a Metropolitan Police source stating that HOME SECRETARY JACQUI SMITH'S HUSBAND has been missing from their Palatial London Home for the last 48 hours.

Mr Smith was last seen at Kings Cross Station boarding a train for Scotland for a 24 hour dirty video Seminar. He was due to change trains in Penrith and this is the last time he was seen, walking down the edge of the platform.

He is not thought to be dangerous, but if spotted by a member of the public, do not approach without a box of tissues.

THE BUDGET TOMORROW must be a REGGIE BLINKER, (scotch rhyming slang me old cocker), going by the shite coming out of no 10.

First BLEARS does a "quickie" coming out of the door and then MugaBroon gives us some load of fucking shite about MPs' expenses on the DOWNING STREET WEBSITE.

Does nothing get trailed in Parliament first, nowadays?

What a WANKER and the embarrassing thing is, he's Scottish. But then, in a little known fact to our English cousins, was BLIAR.

AND WHAT A PRICK HE WAS. HE'S NOW TRYING TO TELL THE POPE HOW TO RUN A TWO THOUSAND YEAR OLD CHURCH!


Tuesday, 21 April 2009

Efficiency savings-My arse




+
BEWARE THESE FUCKING NUTTERS IF YOU MEET THEM IN THYE STREET!
It has been reported that Broon and Darling want to cut £1500 per annum
from the Scottish Budget in ECONOMY SAVINGS!
The whole world can tell them how to make savings:
1. Cancel Trident £70 billion
2. Bring the troops home £10 billion
3. No more money for the Olympics £10 billion
4. Cancel all PFI/PPP contracts £170 billion
TOTAL £260 BILLION
It seems that Scottish Banks are becoming liked Scottish athletes!
Labour were happy to take the tax in the good years and the banks were British. As soon as they have to be bailed out they're Scottish.
Same old English labour PISH!

Monday, 20 April 2009

DARLING RAPES SCOTLAND'S FUTURE TO PAY FOR LABOUR'S MISMANAGEMENT OF ECONOMY

NEVER TRUST A BASTARD WHO DYES HIS EYEBROWS!
ALISTAIR DARLING is expected to announce in his Budget incentives for oil companies to drill in more inaccessible places in the North Sea. He is looking forward to the tax take from 25 BILLION BARRELS OF OIL!

THIS IS AN INDEPENDENT SCOTLAND'S BANK. And to make it worse the SNP agree with him!

Are they off their fucking heads?

This is oil that should be developed in future years to help finance an independent SCOTLAND. We are being raped to pay for BROON'S MISMANAGEMENT OF THE ECONOMY OVER THE LAST 11 YEARS!!!!!
.........................................................................................................................................................................

It happened 30 years ago with THATCHER, NOW IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN.
SCOTLAND BAILING OUT THE UK ECONOMY!

Sunday, 19 April 2009

ANOTHER SCOOP FOR DARK LOCHNAGAR!

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ANDREW NEIL AND ANITA ANNAND ARE ALLEGEDLY AN "ITEM"!


It is being leaked out of the BBC in Whitechapel tonight that ANDREW NEIL, he of the sticky out ears and face like a BULLDOG licking piss off a nettle may have allegedly become embroiled with the LUCIOUS AND FRAGRANT, ANITA ANNAND, his protege on the "Daily Politics" show on the BBC at lunchtimes.

The twisted old lothario has been seen gamboling like a NEW BORN LAMB IN THE SPRING SUNSHINE as he and his alleged lover have taken their dogs for a walk in Hyde Park.

Indeed one lady was so taken aback that she damn nearly fell off her horse, don't you know, at the sight of the acerbic old twat.


Oh, and the Labour e-mail scandal looks set to engulf RAY COLLINS, THE GENERAL SECRETARY OF THE LABOUR PARTY. His resignation is widely expected shortly.


Saturday, 18 April 2009

Mincey Mandelson, pleasure for some

SIX BARRAGE BALLOONS SIGHTED AT GLENROTHES HIGHLAND GAMES.
Following on from MINCEY MANDELSON'S directive that we have got to cheer up and be less pessimistic, I give you a picture to cheer up 60% of men, 15% of women and about 2% of mincey's pals, (because it reminds them of their mothers).

It's easy to be cheery when you're MINCEY WITH HIS MP'S PENSION, HIS EC PENSION, HIS LORDS EXPENSES AND HIS MINISTERIAL SALARY.

Still it's not all good news. I am told he likes a wee discreet BUNG two or three times a week!

Friday, 17 April 2009

GORGDY'S BIG DAY OUT IN GLASGOW ENDS IN ACRIMONY

MINCEY MANDY THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS!




GORDY'S day out in Glasgow, turned into a mitigated disaster.





He said the sorry word for the dodgy e-mails





JACQUI SMITH DIDN'T say the sorry word for the DAMIAN GREEN FIASCO





ED MILLIBAND got told by all and sundry to stick his NUCLEAR PLANTS up his ARSE





MINCEY MANDY, despite unemployment rising faster since records began in 1971, national debt being higher than after the 2ND WORLD WAR AND THE FUCKING ECONOMY about to go TITS UP, told the SCOTS not to be so PESSAMISTIC.





WHAT A PRICK!





The SNP's response was SWIFT AND CUTTING:





With Scotland's economy heavily dependent on a healthy financial services sector, a sector which has been rocked by the loss of HBOS, the partial nationalisation of RBS and the projected loss of at least 11,000 jobs, Lord Mandelson's remarks generated a furious reaction from his political opponents.John Mason, the SNP's work and pensions spokesman, said: "Peter Mandelson's extraordinary remarks are yet another indication of just how out of touch the UK Labour government is."Lord Mandelson may not be feeling the pinch, but when families and businesses across Scotland are really struggling – with figures this week showing sharply rising unemployment in Glasgow – it is bad taste and bad judgment for him to deny the reality of the Downing Street downturn."And he added: "If Peter Mandelson can only lecture people – and cannot understand what is actually going on in the economy – then he has wasted the public money spent on the Cabinet's visit to Glasgow, because he has clearly learnt nothing about the impact of Labour's recession."





As we say in Scotland-Stick that up your FECKIN KYBER!

Thursday, 16 April 2009

MILLIBAND- YOU WILL HAVE NUCLEAR STATIONS!


ONE OF THE MILLIBAND BROTHERS-I THINK THIS ONE IS ED!
Ed is coming up to Scotland tomorrow to tell us that we as a country self-sufficient in power generation and a net exporter of Electricity to our English cousins have to build two new NUCLEAR POWER STATIONS.
Now I and the Scottish Government don't want any NUCLEAR POWER STATIONS for the following reasons.
1. We don't need them.
2. They're dangerous if they explode
3. They will be manned by French and German engineers, who build them.
4. Consequently there will be no long term jobs.
5. There is no safe way of getting rid of spent fuel.
6. They are extremely expensive to decommission.
7. They could be terrorist targets.
8. We've got the nuclear subs- that's enough.
9. Green electricity will help towards the UK's climate change levy
10. You can stick them up yer erse!
Sorry Ed, but the country is against them and we are FED UP BEING TOLD WHAT TO DO BY WESTMINSTER!

Wednesday, 15 April 2009

Brown still in the SHITE with McBRIDE

BROWN STILL SAYS HE DIDN'T KNOW!
Gordon Brown the Leader of this once great country and supposed guardian of the country's morals, the son of the manse, IS ROTTEN TO THE FUCKING CORE!

This was once a free country where any man could make his feelings and opinions clear. That is why we have Speakers Corner at Hyde Park.

Now we have surveillance cameras all over our country and FUCKING LABOUR SPIN DOCTORS ARE THE REAL LEADERS OF THIS COUNTRY I don't suppose they have MI5 taking photographs and copying their e-mails like the rest of us.

Tuesday, 14 April 2009


McBRIDE ON THE LEFT, OBVIOUSLY LIKES A WEE REFRSHMENT!
As it's Easter Monday, I am going to leave tonight's blog to BORIS JOHNSON in his article in today's Telegraph, which seems to be light years ahead of any Scottish Qualities!
I don't want to talk about McBride. I don't want to think about him. There is a large part of me that does not want to read another sentence about this lately exploded pustule on the posterior of the British body politic. But as I look at his rubicund face as it leers from the papers, and as I study his ludicrous emails, I feel it is my duty to history to share with readers my own experience of McBride and McBride-ism.

It was a trivial enough episode in itself. And yet it left me convinced that this decaying, clapped-out, paranoid Labour government had finally forfeited the moral authority to rule, for one simple but decisive reason: they were patently more interested in themselves than in the good of the country.

My moment of revelation took place in August last year. It was the Olympic handover party in Beijing, and it had been organised with great panache and economy by the London authorities. It was a terrific, almost euphoric event in the courtyard of one of the old hutongs.
The mood was exalted not so much because London was to be the next host city, but because we were celebrating extraordinary athletic achievements by Team GB. British competitors had not only done well in cycling, sailing and rowing. They had produced some sensational results in boxing and in track and field; and the overall result was the best performance by a British Olympic team for 100 years.
Here, surely, with the eyes of the world upon us, was the moment for the handful of British politicians to put aside party squabbles. It was a moment for maturity. It was a moment to stop spinning and sniping. It was time to salute the athletes and bask in their reflected glory. Or so you might have thought. It must have been sometime after midnight, when the speeches had been made and the athletes cheered for the umpteenth time, that someone came up and whispered some mystifying news. There was a picture of Myra Hindley on display somewhere in the compound.
What? I said. Why on earth would someone be showing a picture of the notorious child-killer? What had she got to do with the Olympics? It turned out that her portrait was indeed briefly visible, for those with sharp eyes, in a tourism promotion video that was being shown on one of the TV screens. The image had been culled from the Royal Academy's exhibition of Young British Artists, and was presumably designed to show that London was the home of cool, groovy and cutting-edge art and culture of all kinds. In defence of those who made this promo video, Hindley was only on screen for a second, and the video had been used for at least two years, around the world, without any previous complaint. Still, it was an obvious goof. We pulled it at once, and hoped the fuss would die down.
We reckoned without McBride, who was there with his master, Gordon Brown. All night, the media obsession with Myra Hindley seemed to grow. And that was because all night McBride was on the phone trying to crank the story up – demanding investigations, demanding apologies, issuing furious denunciations in the name of the Prime Minister. At one stage, it really looked as though the good feeling engendered by a British sporting triumph would be extinguished by a hoary old controversy about a Myra Hindley painting.
And who was the fly in the ointment? Who was the slug on the milk bottle? Who was the proverbial t--- in the punchbowl of Olympic joy?
It was the Prime Minister's press officer and strategist, Damian McBride. Because, of course, it wasn't any member of the British team who saw and identified the Hindley portrait. It wasn't even a member of the press corps. It was a member of Gordon Brown's party who spotted the fleeting howler, and it was McBride who – with the indulgence of his boss – tried to turn it into a story.

I was left in the end with a feeling of amazement and disgust. Here was a man paid a six-figure sum, by the taxpayer, to present and explain the work of government. He had flown half-way round the world, again at the expense of the taxpayer, to attend a celebration of British Olympic achievement.

But he had walked into that event determined to find fault. He didn't give a monkey's about the athletes, and he didn't give a toss about the way Britain might be perceived by other countries. He simply wanted to find a way – any way – of having a go at the London authorities who had organised the affair, because the people of London had recently had the temerity not to vote for a Labour mayor. He wanted to poison the party, even if it meant embarrassing Britain in a foreign capital. He did not succeed, but I am afraid that in that moment he and his master stood revealed.
I Look at these emails, and the nauseating priorities they show. This McBride has been in charge, since September, of government strategy. He is meant to be coming up with ways of helping people through the recession. And what do we have? A load of pathetic and invented smears, with McBride egging on the blogs to mount false attacks not just on MPs but on their wives.
It is contemptible, and it is a function of the bunker-like desperation in which the Prime Minister and his allies now find themselves.
In their relentless, brutal, tribal viciousness they are no longer interested in doing good for the country, but only in doing down their opponents. They have lost their moral case to govern the country. They must go.
AND SO SAY ALL OF US, BORIS!

Monday, 13 April 2009

Jim Murphy-The SKULL

ARE YOU IN THEIR SOMEWHERE, JIM?


Why is The Scottish Secretary, JIM MURPHY, such an annoying SHITEBAG?



His job is to be SCOTLAND'S REPRESENTATIVE in the UK Cabinet. Not some ranting, Labour Party, political mouthpiece.



He never misses a fucking opportunity to have a go at the legitimate Scottish Government in Holyrood.



Devolution was set up by his party and it is just too bad if the people of Scotland decide that they are fed up with the same old Labour, Scottish sleaze and bring in a SNP Government which works for the country.



He would be better talking to his fellow SHITEBAGS, DARLING and BROON SO THAT THEY DON'T CUT £500 MILLION FROM THE SCOTTISH BUDGET NEXT YEAR and allow the SNP to continue the good work they have started despite the budget cutbacks.



A joint Cabinet meeting of the UK and Scottish Cabinets when Broon brings them up here in a few weeks was a brilliant idea. Which Broon through Murphy jumped on from a great height, suggesting a dinner meeting.



WHAT ARE THEY AFRAID OF??????

Saturday, 11 April 2009

Jade Goody and cult of fame

David Beckham relaxing at half time
"Jade Goody has her own place in the history of television and, while it's significant, it's nothing to be proud of. Her death is as sad as the death of any young person, but it's not the passing of a martyr or a saint or, God help us, Princess Di. When we clear the media smokescreen from around her death what we're left with is a woman who came to represent all that's paltry and wretched about Britain today. She was brought up on a sink estate, as a child came to know both drugs and crime, was barely educated, ignorant and puerile.” Michael Parkinson gives his views on Jade Goody, in an article for the Radio Times
Well said, Michael. Thank Christ, I thought it was just me!
Why do we place these morons on such a high pedestal. Because they came third in a talent competition? Because they can cross a ball and take decent free kicks. in the case of David Beckham. I am sure he is a very nice boy, but £150,000+ per week?
The people we should be paying properly are Surgeons, Carers, Foreign Charity Workers and Scientists who are working to improve the lives of people.
Hopefully when we get an independent nation we will drop this cult of celebrity and people will be admired not for winning a "talent" show, but for what they can add to society.


Friday, 10 April 2009

11 out of 12 alleged TERRORISTS are Pakistani students


HOME SECRETARY JACQUI SMITH GOES FOR A FISH SUPPER NEAR HER LONDON HOME



11 out of the 12 alleged TERRORISTS arrested in dawn raids to day were PAKISTANI students on a student visa. What is this Government and MI5 doing letting every Tom, Dick and Rashid into this country? Are there no checks being done before they are let in?

This is not a PAKISTANI issue, as far as I am concerned. If they were Australians, I would feel the same way.

There is however a problem with radical Muslims and whilst there are thousands of Muslims who are happy to live in Scotland and be part of Scottish Society and they are very welcome, we must do something about the Radicals.

Is our Home Secretary Jacqui Smith more interested in fiddling her expenses rather than doing her job? The problem is that there is too much POLITICAL INTERFERENCE with the Security Services to allow them to do their job properly.

SORT IT OUT SMITH/BROON OR GTF!

Thursday, 9 April 2009

AND TONIGHT'S MOAN IS----------

Tonight's moan is these Pricks who insist on using the Gaelic language on Newspaper Chat Rooms, as if the ability to speak Gaelic somehow makes you more SCOTTISH.

I speak Spanish and smatterings of other European Languages. Although not as romantic as Gaelic, probably a lot more use in modern living.

I wish that I was able to speak some Gaelic, but I suppose I will just have to pride myself in my Ancestors in Clan Chattan leading the Highlanders' charge at Culloden in 1746.

Wednesday, 8 April 2009

IRISH TAKE THEIR MEDICINE BUT LABOUR WILL LEAVE IT FOR THE TORIES.

Ireland today had to take their medicine after the Irish Government brought in a cost cutting budget. But their debt is only 25% of GDP whilst ours in the UK is approaching 50%. But are we taking the medicine? No! Like a madman two days off bankruptcy, the one-eyed Scottish Idiot is spending our future tax increases and public sector cuts like there is no tomorrow!

THIS INSANITY HAS TO STOP NOW! THESE ARE THE POLICIES OF A MADMAN!
LABOUR OUT NOW BEFORE MORE DAMAGE IS DONE!

Monday, 6 April 2009

GEOFF HOON-HOW I MADE MY FIRST MILLION FROM THE TAXPAYER IN EXPENSES

The Cabinet Minister who sent Britain's Armed Forces into the Iraq war claimed expenses on his constituency house and rented out his London home - while living throughout the conflict in a palatial grace-and-favour apartment in Whitehall.
Former Defence Secretary Geoff Hoon, now Transport Secretary in Gordon Brown's Government, lived rent-free for three-and-a-half years in Admiralty House, London, once occupied by Winston Churchill.
He used the opportunity to earn money from the London house he had declared to the Commons authorities as his 'main home' by renting it to a private tenant via a commercial lettings agency.
At the same time he claimed more than £70,000 in a 'second-home allowance' on his home in Derby, close to his constituency of Ashfield, Nottinghamshire.
In effect, it meant that during the war, and for three years afterwards, Mr Hoon had one home absolutely free, a second one covered by Commons expenses, and a third one which had initially been funded by expenses, paid for by rent.
And when he gave up his grace-and-favour apartment, he bought a new £635,000 London home and changed his 'main home' declaration which meant he could use his second-home allowance to help pay for it - and provide a home for his adult son.
Mr Hoon insists he has done absolutely nothing wrong and maintains everything was approved by the Commons authorities.
Mr Hoon has made £millions out of the taxpayer in expenses. It may have been approved but we think you and your labour sleazebag comrades are THIEVING BASTARDS!

Sunday, 5 April 2009

Jane Goody's funeral

WITH ALL the formal street choreography of East End gangland mourning, mixed with the staged pomp of a Diana-style state funeral, London yesterday said goodbye to 27-year-old reality-television star Jade Goody, in a procession of grief that looked like a tear-jerking, series-ending finale.
"It's a circus," said one weeping woman on her way to the funeral service at St John the Baptist Church in Buckhurst Hill, Essex. Dressed in a Burberry woollen hat and massive sunglasses, she added again: "It's a circus, but it's what Jade would have wanted."
Why had she come all the way from West Ruislip to Essex? "I had to come because it would have been a burden for the rest of my life if I didn't make this journey. She was amazing."

FUCK ME!

Saturday, 4 April 2009

What did Broon get from the G20

Britain has as its Prime Minister a master of political illusion. He may not be much of an orator, but there is no one better at dressing up old money as new. If the G20 nations wanted to fake progress, to spin a $1.1 trillion figure while committing no new money at all, then Gordon Brown is their man. “This is the day that the world came together to fight the global recession, not with words but with a plan,” said our Dear Leader. Well, let’s have a closer look at this supposed plan…
1) “Making available an extra $1 trillion”. Ahh, those Brown verbal tricks. What does “make available” mean? Is it guarantees, promises, statement of intent? Real spending? Not a penny of cold hard cash has been pledged by anyone. The sum is concocted by taking the IMF’s pre-existing $500bn target for its bailout fund (a target it still hasn’t met), adding another $250bn to the target. And, then, we add a $250bn fund which the IMF would create by printing its own special money.
2) IMF Funds “treble to $750 billion”. Very fishy. We heard from the IMF on Valentine’s Day that it wanted double its rescue fund to $500 billion – then it said it wanted even more. So where has the extra $250bn come from? Who has stumped it up? No one, it appears - it's just a target. And then the IMF will print its own money, in its own pretend “currency” (called Special Drawing Rights or SDR), and then allow its members to swap this for real money. The idea was once rejected by US Congress, but Obama thinks he won’t need congressional approval now the limit is kept to $250bn. But to be clear: no one has stumped up any new cash. It’s a little quantitative easing for the world – aimed, I suspect, at Eastern Europe. China will be happy as it wants SDRs to replaced the US dollar as a reserve currency.
3) Old pledges dressed as new. Brown gave a breakdown of who had stumped up: Japan, he said, contributed $100bn to the IMF. Yes it did: in January. The EU has agreed to contribute $100bn, he added. We know: this was announced at the last EU summit. Brown said China has chipped in just $40bn, and this appears to be new. But given the size of Beijing’s $2 trillion piggy bank, that is a rather derisory amount (and won’t buy it a seat on the IMF board). The Brazilians had thought China was good for $100bn.
4) Double counting. The Dear Leader has good news. “We are going to act decisively to kickstart international trade” But how? “We will ensure availability of at least $250 billion over the next two years." Note that “over two years” means that this is $125bn, double counted. Why not make it four years, and whack up an extra $1 trillion? It’s just a joke. Nor is this real cash – it comes from trade insurance schemes to protect importers and exporters. It’s not money being spent by governments. Pure Brown-style fiscal conjuring.
5) Tax havens. “We have agreed there will be an end to tax havens that do not transfer secrecy on request.” This is a piggybacking on the long-running OECD campaign against tax havens – this is not a G20 initiative. Brown solemnly announced the OECD would publish a list of non-compliant nations, as if this were a breakthrough. It has been doing this for the last year – here is a list of the most recent such announcements.
6) “The Washington consensus is over”. A curious aside from Brown – and a dog whistle to the Soros/Naomi Klein school of economics. The so-called “Washington Consensus” doesn’t refer to any formal economic protocol. It is used by the likes of Soros to denote what he calls ‘free market fundamentalism’. The academic who coined the term talks about its abuse here.
7) Ban on new trade barriers. Yeah, right. They agreed this in November and, since then, 17 of the 20 countries have increased trade barriers.
8) Brown’s gold advice: “I’ve been proposing this to the IMF for ten years”. He was certainly proposing in 1999 that the IMF sold gold – then priced at $278 an ounce. Luckily, the IMF ignored Brown and gold is now $890 an ounce. Shame he didn’t take the IMF’s advice when it was warning his borrowing would end in tears.
9) “For the first time, we have come together to set principles for the global finance system.” As far as I can determine, all they have agreed is that banks and hedge funds should be regulated – but don’t say how. Ergo, it’s meaningless.
10) No fiscal stimulus. It’s mentioned twice in the 3,080 word document – there wasn’t one. Both Brown and Obama wanted the world to contribute new money. They failed. There was none of the big agreement that Brown led us to believe. There was a split, as evidenced by the Franco-German minority report yesterday. But still it’s a big summit, a deal was done (albeit a fairly nebulous one) and the threatre was fine.
On a presentational basis, this his has worked out well for Brown. I suspect the G20 will be written up well tomorrow, just as his Budgets are always written up well – “2p tax reduction!” – before we all realise we’ve been swindled. So look out for triumphant declarations of “$1.1 trillion to save the world” in tomorrow’s papers. Listening to Brown today, it was as if he were giving a Budget for the world. And I suspect the world is about to learn how illusory a Brown promise really is.

The Ibrox two get their comeuppance

THE IBROX TWO, Messrs. Ferguson and McGregor have today been banned from playing for Scotland for ever and suspended from GLASGOW RANGERS FOOTBALL CLUB, for 2 weeks with a move out of the club on the cards for the summer.

Both of these young men and Ferguson in particular earn, by ordinary standards, fabulous sums of money. They have proven however not to have the maturity to deserve it, after their BEVVY session in the Hotel after the Holland game and what was even less forgivable were the naive, petulant "v" signs that they both gave from the bench during the game like two 10 year olds who had had a row from their mammy.

Thankfully both the SFA and their club have acted decisively in punishing them. I have no doubt the story will rumble on.

The Ibrox 2 sounds like the old story about the Renault 5, but that's probably a story more suited to the pub!

Friday, 3 April 2009

Broon doesn't get deal from G20

Gordon Broon, the Great White Elephant, was spinning out of control after the G20 meeting. Truth is however is that the unnecessary and expensive meeting was indeed a failure. Absolutely not one Dollar of extra fiscal stimulus money was put on the table. The money boasted about was already in place weeks ago. The majority of the money is coming from "trade credits" or "quantitative easing". The EU cannot bail out individual states under it's rules, so it has to channel the money via the IMF. The whole plan will unravel, like all Broon's budgets by a week next Tuesday. You read it here first!

At long last, Frank Hadden, the Scottish Rugby Coach, has been sacked. Now we need a root and branch sorting out of the game's structures, starting with kicking out "the blazers" in charge and bringing in some ex-players.

Thursday, 2 April 2009

A dark day for Scotland and the oil industry

Today was a dark day for Scotland and the Oil Industry with the news that 16 people have been killed following a helicopter crash in the North Sea. It reminds us that the "black gold" is not without tragedy as many people have been killed over the years. It's just a shame that Westminster Governments since the 70s, have frittered the proceeds away on inconsequential spending, such as now, bailing out the Banks.

My sympathies go to the family and friends of all involved and we thank you for their sacrifice.

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

SOULD STUPID PEOPLE BE ALLOWED THE VOTE?

Whilst attending to my toilet needs yesterday, I casually picked up some magazine that my wife had been reading. Flicking through it I happened upon the Physics page. The first letter and I am not lying here was from some women asking the Physic to find out how her floppy eared rabbit had died. The gist of the said Physic's reply was that she had spoken to the rabbit and he had had a heart problem and that's why he died and asked the women not to buy a rat or a mouse in his place BECAUSE HE DIDN'T LIKE THEM!

We allow halfwits like this to have the vote and affect our daily lives as in the current crisis. In my opinion, THE WRITER, THE PHYSIC AND THE EDITOR SHOULD NEVER BE ALLOWED TO VOTE AGAIN AND SHOULD PROBABLY BE STERILISED IN CASE THEY BRING ANY POSSIBLE OFFSPRING INTO THE WORLD, UNLESS THEIR PARTNER IS A SCIENTIST OR SIMILAR.

I see another LABOUR SLEAZEBAG, LORD MEYNERS, HAS BEEN CAUGHT OUT, because McKILLOP has stated that he knew all along about Fred Goodwin's pension. RESIGN NOW YOU SLIMEBALL!